12.09.2004

Nothing

I have nothing witty to say today

The little countdown to Christmas Santa at home mocks me daily -- only 16 days until Christmas! That's what it says today -- what I *hear* however is "Get those cards done! Get the pictures in them! Mail them out! Get ready for Buddy's first birthday party! Buy the rest of your gifts! Wrap them! Don't forget about the stockings! Clean the house!"

I'm tired. This week, I'm just plumb worn out for no good reason. This week, it doesn't matter how much sleep I get, I'm still tired. I can't seem to get moving when I'm awake, and work...? Fa-get-about-it. I can't get anything done at work, and when I do, it's wrong or incomplete or just not enough.

There are Christmas songs playing and I have decorated at home and at my office here, in the hopes that it would lift my spirits a bit, but it hasn't so far. I know this funk is only a temporary thing, but it drags me way down and impedes any progress I make on anything.

Last night, rather than stay home with the kids while Hubby went out, I offered to tag along (with the kids)-- why? Because I didn't feel I could be a good Mom on my own for a couple of hours. TWO HOURS home alone with three kids -- I just couldn't do it. I didn't want to go out, but I didn't want to stay home. I knew that if we all went along, the kids would be occupied and wouldn't "need me" for anything.

Dinner consisted of frozen pizza because I didn't have the energy or wherewithall to even brown hamburger for one of those quickie "in a box" meals.

I know this funk is nothing that a couple of Midol and a whole lot of quality time with my pillow, comforter and snuggly jammies couldn't cure. Right now, though, right now, I just feel nothing.

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