9.12.2006

Rainy Days and School Days

I really don't like the string of rainy, dreary days we've had here lately. This morning, the layer of fog in the air was like pea soup.

Punkin has been back to school for a couple of weeks now, and is really enjoying third grade. She has a "Student Planner" and she loves being able to fill that out with what she needs to do, etc.

This is Sweet Pea and Buddy's second week in their new daycare center. Sweet Pea is thriving there! She loves having new "friends" to play with and has really been having a good time. On her first day, she was very excited to put on her new dress, and go meet her teacher.

I wish I could say the same for Buddy. On his first day of school, he undressed himself (after I had already gotten him ready to go to school) and flat out refused to go. When I pick him up every night, though, he rushes into my arms and hugs me and seems to be in good spirits. I know he has fun and enjoys the activities they do. Dropping him off in the morning, though is another thing entirely.

Last week was ok. It was his first week at the school, and we knew there would be some adjustment. He handled it pretty well. This week seems a bit worse, though. It's like he has just realized we mean to take him to this place every single day when Mommy and Daddy have to work and he's not happy about it at all.

This week, he has been doing fine as we get out of the van, walk into the building and walk into the room where everyone meets. (He and Sweet Pea are together for a little while every morning until more kids arrive. Then, they split into their respective classes.)

I'm not sure exactly when it starts, but I'll look at him to say goodbye, only to see his big brown puppy dog eyes all watery and tears rolling down his face. He's not making a sound, just crying quietly. I get down on his level to comfort him, and then the big heart-wrenching sobs come. I hold him, rub his back, comfort him some more, but he's not fooled. "Mommy back?" I tell him "Of course, I'm coming back!" Another hug and kiss and I try to leave and he grabs my legs when I stand up, sobbing. (He's got a good grip, too)

I try to redirect him "Look! Toys! Trucks!" or "Wave to Mommy out the window, ok?" but he's not fooled. I'm still leaving him there.

Today, I asked Sweet Pea to help her brother a bit. "Rub his back a bit, show him some toys, maybe play with him a bit, ok?" and she agreed she would try to help him, and she does, for a minute or two. When it's apparent he doesn't want to play or be comforted, she moves on to something else.

There isn't much the teacher can do for him either, he will not be consoled, and gets himself so worked up, he ends up coughing up a bunch of "yuck"... which makes him cry more.

For the past two mornings, I've walked out of the building and heard him crying through the window. I look over and he has both hands pressed against the window, his face red and wet from crying. "Mommmmmmmyyyyyyy...."

The hardest thing to do on days like this is paste on a happy face, wave, and say "I love you! See you soon!" and get in my van and leave him there.

It is SO VERY DIFFICULT.

And yet, I know it's a phase. I know this. I've been through it with Punkin when she was little. Sweet Pea never really had a problem with me leaving her in a daycare situation. We'll get through it, I know.

Still, rainy days for my boy are rainy days for me.

12 comments:

Nilbo said...

I always felt almost slighted when my kids would blow out of the car to race to the nursery school doors and get away from me. Not that I would have traded it for the tearful goodbye. But still, it was like "Aww ... not even a little bit of regret?"

You know you're doing everything right. He'll come around. But it must be wrenching. I feel for you ...

stay-at-home mommy said...

Poor little guy. Poor mommy, too. I've been there with my oldest - he cried for the first two weeks of playschool last year. He started again last week and so far so good! I think it'll go off without a hitch this time. Hopefully little Buddy adjusts quickly to his new situation. ((hugs))

Mr. Bloggerific Himself said...

It's rough, that's for sure. Gotta play it by ear. Some days you need to stay a minute longer, some days you need to move more quickly while they're doing ok.

Shelby said...

Aw, Kel...I know how difficult it is for a parent to let go at daycare. As a former daycare teacher, I can ASSURE you that you are doing exactly the right thing. The shorter the goodbye is, the easier it will become in the long run.

Not that it helps much now....

Love you, chickie. And I hope it gets easier for you all.

LadyBug said...

Oh, honey, I know that feeling. Holding the fake smile until I'm out of sight of my little one and then crying all the way to work. It breaks a Mommy's heart to see her little one so upset.

I hope he settles into the new routine soon.

In the meantime, much love and many hugs to you, dear.

avasouth said...

Oh, Kelli. I am so sorry about Buddy's bad time with being left. As Moms, we know it will pass, but it surely is hard going through it.

Huggs.

Ava

eclectic said...

Gah, that's no fun. My oldest and youngest are like Nilbo describes -- "Don't let the door hit you in the ass on your way out the door, Mom." OK, they didn't actually say THAT... but they were so eager to play it almost hurt my feelings. My middle guy though, oh dear. Never a fit, just heart breaking tears and trembling lip. He's still the most cautious in new situations. It's a personality trait, I guess. I'm sorry you're in that phase -- it's so hard. Hugs, sweetie.

Doug said...

Aw Geez Sis, that's a bummer. Sorry to hear of your daily heartbreak.

Hope Buddy soon grows out of that, but until then it is a bleeding wound all the way to work, and in the back of your mind worry 'til you meet him after work.

Reminds me, what are you going to be when we grow up ?

hellokittn said...

That may very well be the cutest thing ever.

brb. Taking another baby blocker 2000 pill :-). I'm not as strong as you are Super Mom :-*.

Circus Kelli said...

Nilbo, thanks for the encouragement and the comfort.

SAH Mom, that must have been such a long two weeks for you both...

Mr. B., I'm finding that out. Thank you.

Shelby, thanks, love! I hope all is well with you.

LadyBug, love and hugs right back at you, darlin.

It surely is, Ava. Hopefully it passes, soon.

Eclectic, Sweet Pea is like that "You still here, Ma?" Hugs to you, love!

Doug, "bleeding wound" is right. Grow up? Who's growing up?! Not me!

Kittn, you go girl! Wuv you!

Lynn said...

It's been rainy and gloomy here, too. It's making the kids a little stir-crazy even though they have tons of homework. I just don't remember having this much homework in elementary school! This is what my bigger kids are having a problem with right now. Poor things!

Bone Machine said...

Just be thankful that he didn't undress *at* daycare.

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