My Circus Life

April 1

2010-04-01T10:24:00.000-05:00

(Blame it on the sappy book I just read, the cycles of the moon, the changing of the seasons... whatever. I needed to get this out today)

Five years ago, I had most of my grandparents here with me. Papa George passed back in 1980 when I was 12 years old. I took it hard, but I was still lucky enough to have had my two Grandmothers and my other Papa still around. That is, until noon on April 1st, 2005.

Grandma had been battling cancer and was losing. We knew it was coming. Mom, Dit, Hubs, Punkin and I were all on our way down to Florida, trying to get there in time. As we stood in line at a McDonald's in Kentucky, (or was it Tennessee?), my cell phone rang. I stepped outside so I could hear better as the nurse said, "She's passed. She's gone." My brain switched off for a moment and I looked at my sister as I hung up the phone. We cried for a moment, hugged. "I guess we don't have to rush now."

Our two car caravan arrived at Grandma's house, empty now except for the things she'd accumulated over the years, the memories she'd left, and her son, Mike who had been staying with her. Mike was my Dad for a few years. He'd adopted me (with Mom) and fathered Dit, then things happened, Mom and Dad divorced, and after a while, he chose not to be a part of our lives.

Dealing with Grandma's death, getting her house in order, and handling her estate were difficult. Doing all of that while still being a Mom to the child we brought with, and the two children being watched by friends and family back home was difficult. Doing all that and dealing with the fact that Mom, Dit and I had not seen Mike in 25-30 years was extrememly difficult. I was the executor of Grandma's estate, the go-between, the only one who was willing to talk to Mike. It was a very stressful time for all of us.

Wife, Mother, Daughter, Sister, GrandDaughter, Will Executor. Take care of Grandma's wishes. Keep everyone placated and civil. Walk on eggshells, take everyone's emotions into consideration. Try not to ruffle feathers. Fail. Miserably. Realize you can't smooth it over. Handle distribution of Grandma's things. Put the house on the market. Talk to the lawyer. Are the kids back home ok? Who is watching them today? Is everything handled up there? Talk to Hospice. Forward the mail. Check in with work. Do they need anything? Talk to Grandma's neighbors. Work out what needed to be done for next week's closing on the new home we were buying. Go to the bank. Deal with the fact that the father that didn't want to be a part of my life is suddenly in the same room with me nearly 24/7. Answer Punkin's questions about who that man is and why she hasn't seen him before. Eat. Sleep. Repeat.

After we had done what needed to be done, Mom and Dit went back home. The next morning, Mike left. Hubs and Punkin were getting dressed for the day while I stood in the kitchen talking to Mike. Mike and I hugged goodbye and then he was gone. Hubs came out of the bedroom and held me in the kitchen while I broke down. It was all suddenly too much to deal with. Punkin looked nervous about my outburst when she came into the kitchen. I did what I could to pull myself together and moved forward. There were still some things that needed to be settled and taken care of, but we had done all we could up to that point. We left the house in Florida for the last time a few hours later and that was that.

Time passed. Life doesn't stop, does it?

We closed on the new house, then we closed on the old house, summer came, I had seminars to attend for work, and in July we hosted our first birthday party in the new home. The day before that party, we got word that Grandma's house had sold. I hung up the phone and cried again, relief laced with grief.

Hubs and I dealt with different personal health issues, the kids acclimated to their new surroundings and new school. Just when it felt like things were getting settled, my other Grandmother became sick and passed away. I was not the executor of her will and distanced myself from the business end of her death as much as I could. I was not asked to speak at her funeral -- something that I'm sure was decided by others based on the lingering emotions from my other Grandmother's death the year before. I was an observer at that funeral, included because it was the polite thing to do. That's how it felt to me anyway.

In the weeks before her death, there was speculation as to "what would happen" to Papa now. His health was failing. He was showing signs of Dementia and his hearing was already on the way out. He couldn't be alone. He'd lost his wife and his home in a matter of months. Living in a nursing home has aged him quickly. He doesn't say much when I visit with him, and I don't think he knows me. The man who gave me away at my wedding, the tallest man I knew until I met Hubby has forgotten me and my children. I've lost the Papa I knew. He's a living ghost.

April 1 is a marker of sorts for me, a dividing line. We've made it through the cold, gray winter months and spring is on the way. It's also a reminder of losses, and a time of quiet reflection -- *snork* ok, that sounds completely pretentious, but you know what I mean, right? I think about how (thank goodness!) spring is on the way, the good times with my grandparents, the things they taught me, and how they're still a part of my life.

I'm not a big fan of April Fool's Day. It represents too much for me. I like April 2 way better.

Progess, Not Perfection

2010-03-08T08:42:00.000-06:00

I forget that the negative inner-dialogue has an effect on how I feel about myself and other things in general.

I'm tired, sarcastic and cynical.

This weather today sucks - rain, mist, fog. If I can just make it through this weather, the warmer temps and sunshine are waiting on the other side, I just know it.

I've temporarily lost "the spark" - this past week. My ability to be positive and upbeat seems gone. I've thumbed my nose at all I know I need to do in order to feel better, both physically and mentally. I haven't exercised in days, not even strength training, and I've been eating too much.

I thought I was past this. I had been doing well for a few weeks - not fantastic, but I felt like I was moving forward at least -- making progress. I figured yeah, some days would be more of a challenge than others, but I thought that I could overcome that. Had I made some attempt to fight the blahs, I probably could have. Instead, I completely gave myself over to them.

Work is getting busier - my boss got a promotion of sorts, and while it doesn't necessarily mean a promotion for me, I am very pleased that he still wants to keep me working for him. For the most part, I do like what I do. After a little bit of shopping last week, I now have a couple more pairs of work pants that fit me -- something I *really* needed. Being a bit more 'professional' is a good thing. This "new professionalism", unfortunately, keeps me off the internet for most of the day now. There aren't many people at work that I confide in, or consider friends. At times, I feel pretty isolated. Cutting out the internet makes that worse. It becomes easy for me to retreat into my own little world - just the task list and MiPod (when the boss is out of the office).

At home, the kids have been somewhat cranky and taking it out on me. They don't sass Hubby at all, just me. This weekend could have been worse, but the disrespect still gets pretty old.

This past weekend, I spent Saturday cleaning and straightening. It was nice that the family helped out a bit, very nice. Still, everywhere I looked, something needed to be clean. I'd finish one task and see two more that needed doing. I worked hard, but I don't think I overdid it. I made a list and stuck to it. Once I was done with the list, I stopped. The house was "clean enough" when we were done.

"Focus on PROGESS, not perfection"

That kept running through my head on Saturday. The house wasn't perfectly clean, but I'd made progress, and it felt good. I've made progress on my goals, but not much. A little progress feels good, but now I've stopped.

Instead of staying in bed this morning, or curling up into a ball under a blanket on the couch (which is what I really want to do), I'm at work... albeit reluctantly. I've told myself that I'm going to start over today -- that today is a good day -- that TODAY I'll do better. Better at work, better with the kids, better with the husband, better "inside".

I will. I have to. I will I will I will...

It Must Have Been A Good Day

2010-01-20T20:25:00.001-06:00

This morning started out like any other morning.

Except, this morning, I had an appointment to get my head examined.

I've had headaches for years and years and years. They don't happen every day, but when they do, they can become excrutiating. Five years ago, I saw a neurologist for the headaches. He ordered an MRI, found nothing significant, and, because of the symptoms and timing, determined them to be hormonally related.

In the past few months, the headaches have no pattern, and have begun to last more than a day or so -- some lasting a week.

My 2010 goals include checking into the headaches (again) and getting a long overdue eye exam. (I've noticed my vision changing. Now, it is true that I'm over 40. I've never had perfect vision, and some vision changes associated with age wouldn't surprise me.)

After dropping off the clowns at school, I went home, had some breakfast, then left to get an MRI before going in to work. (Heh, just a day like any other)

Since, I've had an MRI before, I knew what to expect. All I had to do was insert the squishy, orange earplugs into my ears, lay there, don't move, and try not to fall asleep. Actually, falling asleep wouldn't be bad, but I twitch when I sleep. Sometimes violently. Since I was supposed to hold still and not move, falling asleep wouldn't win me any friends with the Tech. (And she was a nice lady, but it could be that she hadn't had her morning coffee when I saw her.)

As I lay there staring at the inside of the noisy metal tube through the cage over my face, I let my mind drift. Have you seen the episode of House where the guy's head explodes in the MRI thingy? Yeah, me too. I wasn't nervous about the test, but I figured as long as my head didn't explode, the rest of the day would be a cake walk.

When the test was over, I went to work. The regular routine of my day was trashed -- arriving at work three hours later than usual will do that. I felt like I was dragging behind before I even got started. As such, it was difficult to get a real sense of accomplishment at all. I'd get one thing done, and the boss would fire off three more.

I did eventually schedule, cancel and reschedule all the meetings the boss asked me to, as well as work on a couple of other things. Everything seemed ok, I just felt a little worn out, run down...just a little "meh."

As my workday was drawing to a close, I got this great email from Punkin. After telling her I didn't feel like I accomplished anything today, she replied "I bet you accomplished something. it might be small but you accomplished something right?"

Heh, yes. Yes, I did. That was a good dose of needed perspective.

When I arrived home, Hubs and I looked at the proof that I do indeed have a brain in my head. We even showed the clowns. "Look kids! That's Mommy's brain!" Buddy's comment was "Really? That'is your brain? That is so NOT cool." SweetPea thought it was VERY cool.

Dinner wasn't anything special, and nothing much got done around the house this evening. After the kids were in bed, Hubs and I watched some television. It was another evening just like so many others.

Just before I dropped off to sleep, I had a realization.

My head didn't explode, so it must have been a good day.

Beginning Again

2010-01-07T15:51:00.001-06:00

Although I'm still online quite a bit, I've neglected this blog. I'm on Flickr, Twitter, Facebook and Sparkpeople--just not here. There's not a lot really going on at the Circus. Just the work, family thing - getting back into routine and all that.

The holidays were good, and people seem to be pleased with their gifts - the clowns included. We visited with the different branches of our family tree for Christmas, and opted to stay home with just us for New Years. The clowns stayed up to ring in Dick Clark's New Year's Rockin Eve, except for Buddy who fell asleep at 11:30pm (the kids don't realize what an institution Dick Clark is).

I was even able to get some time to myself between Christmas and New Years - I squandered quite a lot of time reading and relaxing. It was lovely. Unfortunately, it takes time to gain momentum again after lazy days like that.

Part of me is determined to "make changes" this year (nothing life altering, just things I want to improve upon within myself really) and part of me is being a lazy slug. Christmas hasn't been taken down and put away yet, and the living and dining rooms look like a holiday toy tornado went through. (Just after the holidays, I collected any decorations and holiday knick-knacks from around the house and set them on the dining room table - hence the mess in the dining room)

Today was the first "Snow Day" of the New Year for the kids - they weren't disappointed about missing school today in the least. Hubs and I split our work shifts to each spend a half day at home with them. I had some pretty good intentions on what I was going to accomplish with my morning hours at home, but the only thing I accomplished was breakfast for the Circus before getting to work. (And even that felt like a half-baked job)

Maybe it's the cold, gray days that make me want to curl up in the blankets and escape into my favorite music or read the days away. Maybe it's just post-holiday let down. Either way, I'm just feeling pretty mellow.

I hope all is well with you and yours and that 2010 has been good to you so far.

5th Annual Blog Cookie Exchange

2009-12-23T09:37:00.002-06:00

COOKIES!
Originally uploaded by CircusKelli3

Susie is hostessing the 5th Annual Blog Cookie Exchange over at her place.

I've brought my two of my favorite holiday recipes:

Powdered Sugar Crescent Cookies - my Aunt's recipe
I've also made these into "snowballs" - it's easier than shaping the crescents.

1 cup butter (I've found that Imperial Margarine works best)
1/4 cup powdered sugar
1-1/2 tablespoon water
2 teaspoons vanilla
2 cups flour
1 cup chopped walnuts

Cream butter and sugar
Add the rest and wix well.
Shape crescents 1/2" diameter, 1" long
Bake 375 degrees, 15 minutes

Sprinkle or roll in more powdered sugar when cool

Enjoy with milk - plenty of milk!

Sugar Cinnamon Nuts - my Mom's recipe
1 pound nuts (walnuts recommended)
2 cups white sugar
1/4 cup water
1/2 tablespoon cinnamon

Bring sugar, water and cinnamon to a boil.
Add nuts, stir all until mixture starts to crystallize.
Spread on cookie sheet and put in fridge to cool.
Break into bits and eat.

- - - - - - - -

Every Christmas morning, As Hubby assembles and/or adds batteries to any of the toys or games the clowns receive from Santa, I'll cook up our biggest breakfast of the year. We have pancakes, bacon and sausage - not just *any* pancakes, though. They have to be Nonnie's pancakes. To this day, the pancakes she used to make are the best pancakes I've ever tasted. A few weeks ago, Buddy asked (in a voice full of angsty anticipation) "When is it going to be Christmas so we can have pancakes?!" We'll all eat until we're completely full, then roll out of our chairs and contemplate the rest of our day. Usually, we head over to Hubby's Aunt's/Uncle's get-together in the afternoon to exchange gifts.

Christmas Eve is usually spent with my in-laws. The day after Christmas will be the gift exchange with my Mom, Dit and nephew. Our last Christmas exchange of the year is usually with Bio-Mom and Grandpa Choo-Choo. This exchange is usually the more laidback of them all. This year, we've been told we can wear our jammies over to their house if we'd like.

Some of our other traditions include sending out the Christmas newsletter, spoiling the kids a bit, and attempting to not get too stressed out with all that "needs to be done." Last night, we braved the elements and the last minute shoppers at the mall to take the clowns to see Santa.

Tonight I'll do my best to finish wrapping the rest of the gifts and tomorrow I'll make a couple of side dishes to bring over to my in-laws. After that, all I have to do is roll along with the holiday, and do my best to focus more on enjoying the day and the company.

Here's a cup of cheer to toast to the holidays, good friends, laughter and joy.

Best wishes to you for a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

Circus Photos!

2009-12-21T10:42:00.002-06:00

It's been busy busy busy around My Circus Life lately!

See photos of the goings on around the big top over the past few weeks - See photos of the goings on around the big top over the past few weeks (link to Flickr site)

Thanks for stopping by!

More in the coming weeks...

The After Party

2009-11-22T09:17:00.002-06:00

I survived Punkin's party and feeling like crap - between my back stiffening up, and feeling somewhat drunk before I'd had a drop of alcohol, I kinda felt like I was a mess yesterday. The party went fine, and there was actually fewer guests than usual. A last minute change to the amount of chicken ensured we had *just enough* leftover.

Mom and Dit were here with Lukas. Mom's talking about the stuff that Lukas does at this age, and I start saying "Oh yeah, my kids did that..." and I go on to tell the story. Afterwards, Mom says "Wow. I can't believe it." "What?" I say. "Well, you went through all the stuff we're going through (w/Lukas) and you never told us about it." I was dumbfounded. I HAD told them all about that. They just never listened.

I have the Shine All Night concert tonight (Martina McBride/Trace Adkins), but first I'm going to play "Cinderella" and get some chores/errands done. Not a problem. It'll make life easier tomorrow. I don't anticipate getting home much before 1am (the concert is in Milwaukee - at least 90 mins away). I plan on resting tomorrow - around other errands - a parent/teacher conference and taking the van in for an estimate on the bumper (after that 19 yr old tapped my ass* - LOL!)

Hubs is off on the motorcycle with friends - plans made before he realized I had the concert tonight. Thankfully, SIL offered to watch the clowns for us. (Thanks, Shelley!)

After the party last night, Shelley offered to take the kids down to her house for a sleepover, if that was ok with me. "Let me get this straight. You're going to take the kids with you. I'll have a house that's already clean, plans to have fun, and the kids will be gone. Unexpectedly and all at the same time? And, like *now*? Uh, yeah, I think I can handle that." (and my inner child whooped "Hell freakin yeah! Why are you still here?!")

So, here I sit this morning. My music blaring, washing machine and dryer working away, kids and Hubs taken care of. I like this. This 'after party' is better than I anticipated. It's not every day I can have cake for breakfast without guilt.

*That's from my SIL - "So, a 19 yr old tapped your ass, huh?" after hearing about the fender bender.

November 13th

2009-11-15T19:32:00.005-06:00

Right now, it is 7:30pm on a Sunday evening. One clown is fast asleep - Sweet Pea put herself to bed nearly an hour ago. The girl who used to fight going to sleep now snores softly just upstairs. The boy clown had a difficult time earlier tonight, and was sent to his room. He's been talking to me from his room, but is now putting himself to bed. Punkin clown is checking her email before getting herself all tucked in.

It's been a busy weekend.

Friday night, Punkin had a couple of her friends over for a small birthday party. I ordered pizza from Domino's at the birthday girl's request. There were presents, we made sugar cookies and decorated them (in lieu of a cake), and I let them throw pink confetti around the living room. An hour later, it looked like our living room floor (and foyer and dining room) had the measels. The four big sugar cookies turned into two big sugar cookie blobs in the oven, but the girls did a great job of overcoming that (and hey, they were still pretty edible!)

Later, I took the three tweens to see Disney's "A Christmas Carol." (The animation is so well done in that movie, that it was easy to forget it was animation. Wow) Before we left, I had a talk with them. Because I was responsible for all three of them while they were in my care, there were certain rules. I wanted them to have fun, but I also wanted them to understand that they needed to listen to me. They were all very well-behaved, and I guess I really didn't need to worry.

One of the girls was unable to stay for a sleepover. I planned on taking her home after the movie. Her parents were pretty laid back, and felt she was in good hands. I appreciated that. This was the first time this particular girl had been over at our house.

The movie let out around 10:30pm, and I think we were all a little tired, but in good spirits. We were chatting about the movie as we made our way back home, sitting at a stoplight when suddenly, we were hit from behind.

Many things ran through my head at once:
Oh crap.
Is anyone hurt?
Oh no they did'n!
These girls' parents are never going to let them come over again.
I hope whoever hit me doesn't take off.

I remained calm, checked the girls - thankfully, we were all ok. I got my cell phone, got out of the van and met the driver of the other car. The driver was a 19 year old kid and his friend. I dialed 911 as the kid apologized over and over and over. There was minor damage on the bumper of the Mommyvan, and again, I was very grateful that's all there was.

And then the shakes kicked in. I was still able to keep my head about me, but I was shaking pretty badly.

After calling the police, I called home to let Hubby know what happened. Then, I had to call the parents of the girls in the van. I was also very grateful that I could call them with "Everyone is fine, but I wanted to let you know there's been a fender bender..." That sucked, even with the good news. Thankfully, the parents were understanding.

Of course, it was Friday the 13th. I'm not incredibly superstitious, but I will say that our last accident (several years ago on the way to Florida) was also on Friday the 13th. I've pretty much decided that future birthday parties will not involve "field trips" out of the house on Friday the 13th. I think it's just safer that way.

The rest of the evening was pretty uneventful - we got home, the girls stayed up too late and ate cookies until the wee hours of the morning. After our guest left the following day, Punkin and I pretty much crashed.

The family party for Punkin will be on the 21st, which will officially kick off our "busy season." Birthday parties and holidays and all the preparations for such things will take up most of our energy in the next six weeks.

I've already started my to-do lists, birthday lists, and Christmas lists. You can bet I'll be checking them all twice.

Thank goodness we're done with all the Friday the 13ths for the year.

Just like that

2009-10-26T19:54:00.001-05:00

Later this week, I will become 41 years of age. Woo!

Remember last year?! Sure you do. EVERYONE does. WHY? Because I keep telling them about it. I have now become the person people think of when they hear or read about Trace Adkins. (And here I was afraid that I'd leave this world someday without any kind of legacy.)

Now, this year, there wasn't any Trace Chasin' goin' on. I will be attending a Martina McBride/Trace Adkins concert in November, but will most likely not be meeting Trace or Martina in person. With fifth row seats to the concert for Erika and I, I can be very happy with that.

Another thing I am VERY happy about -- Hubby bought me an iPod for my birthday! I've been collecting songs off my CDs for a while now so I could listen to them at work, and in anticipation of this gift. You see, a while back, I borrowed the iPod that Punkin got for her birthday last year so I could have music while I went for a walk. That little gadget came in pretty handy. I decided that I would/might work out more if I had "portable" music. (yeah, that's my story and I'm stickin to it). Since then, I've made it known that I would like an iPod for my birthday, and if I didn't get one as a gift, I was going to go buy one.

(tangent)
Yeah, I know... I can be a snot, but I've learned if I don't clearly announce my wishes, repeatedly, well, there's a chance I might be disappointed and angry because the people who love me apparently still can not read my mind. Clearly, this must be the case because I have to constantly ASK my children to clean their rooms. If they could read my mind, I wouldn't have to ask, now would I?
(/tangent)

Hubby sprang my shiney new iPod on me while we were tooling around with the kids in the family truckster. It made me very happy and I had to pass the still packaged iPod around so the kids could see all the new and shiney of my hot pink iPod. Punkin immediately had iPod envy. Hers is just purple with a smaller screen and it doesn't have a camera or video capabilities. Woo! Hot pink and shiney and new and all upgradey and stuff!

When we got home, Hubs set about to helping me load the songs on the miPod. He just started doing it and I got all flustered and announced that *I* could do that and I wasn't about to have to ask him to load my songs each time I wanted to add something (like he does for Punkin). After all, I'm not a complete idiot. It was very nice of him to help, though. As the songs were being all converted and what not, he wandered off with my iPod. "To charge it", he said. Cool. No problem, I'd just pile up more songs from my CDs while I waited. (I also cleaned up the kitchen and folded laundry while I waited. I wouldn't want y'all to think I was neglecting my chores for my new toy. Heaven forbid.)

After miPod was all charged, Hubs brought it back and set it on my desk. I was in the middle of preparing dinner, and Punkin asked to look at miPod. As long as the littles didn't begin to think miPod was community property, I was ok with that.

Over the next few minutes, Punkin clicked and scrolled and proclaimed she liked miPod better than hers. "Aw, bummer darlin'. That's MINE. Mommy loves you!" *smile*

She made a face at me, and continued to explore "Hey. There's a pedometer on here!"
Me: Really?! Cool! Now I'll have to get a holder thingy for the miPod. (Mental note: check out all the fun accessories available for miPod.)

For the next little while, Punkin played with leaving me voice messages and taking videos and just figuring out all the "extras" on miPod while I continued to make dinner.

The evening wore on and soon it was bedtime for the clowns. Punkin gave me hugs and kisses and said "Really, Mom. If you want to know anything about your iPod, just let me know. I'll be happy to show you how to work stuff."

And just like that, I became one of "those" parents who don't know anything about modern technology.

Damn Whippersnappers.

When Worlds Collide

2009-10-19T14:02:00.002-05:00

I've said it before - Stay At Home Moms have my admiration. I just don't feel that I could be a very good SAHMom.

On the other hand, being a Working Out Of The House Mom has some major disadvantages -- like when the work world and the Mom world collide.

Case in point:
An event at the school for Sweet Pea and her class. Something she is looking forward to. Something I was able to attend when Punkin was involved. Something we worked on a project this weekend for. The event is planned for Friday.

This Friday.

At work, we have an all day meeting coming up. I take care of the meeting room set up, taking the notes, and arranging the catering for the event. There are typically about 50 people in this day-long meeting. The meeting is set for Friday.

This Friday.

Fun "Clown" event at the school.
All day meeting at work.

Responsibilities are tugging at me from two different directions.

With the Boss dealing with stressors, I really really really don't want to ask for two hours off work for any reason. He is, under regular circumstances, a fair and generous boss. (And no one wants to sit in this meeting taking notes for me)

I will put on my big girl panties and do the right thing, but I really do not like having to make choices like this. Not at all. Someone is always "disappointed" no matter what.

New 'do

2009-10-09T07:59:00.003-05:00

It's been years since I've had a cut that was more than "just a trim"... and months since I've done even that. Can you tell?

I finally bit the bullet and got a cut AND highlights (I hardly ever color my hair).

I am very pleased with this! Thank you Dianne and Nu Age Hair!

All before/after photos can be seen here

Clownin' around

2009-10-06T19:36:00.002-05:00

The other evening, we were watching televsion when some actress came on the screen, extolling the benefits of wrinkle-reducing beauty cream.
Buddy looks at me for a moment and says
"You should get that, Mom."
- - - - - - - - -
I asked Punkin to take a few photos of my hair tonight because I will be getting a new 'do in a couple of days. "Should I take a photo of the gray?" she asks. "Sure, why not." I say.
"Yeah, because that's not very difficult to do."
- - - - - - - - -
During a family drive last week, Hubs and I were throwing out acronyms.
OMG!
BFF
When Hubs says "LOL"
Sweet Pea, from the very back of the truck says
"Dad! Do you even *know* what that means?!"
I just busted out laughing while he assured our 7 year old that he did indeed know what LOL meant.
Hubs and I finished the game with a "WTF?", said under our breaths, of course.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Right now as I sit here
The dishwasher is swooshing and humming behind me
My music pours through these computer speakers
Buddy is 'napping' on the couch
I tried to encourage him to just go up and get ready for bed
but he declined
Sweet Pea is nestled in a chair with a poofy pillow and a cozy blanket reading a book
Hubby is catching up with some sports event downstairs, and
I'm not sure where Punkin is

In short
things are peaceful at the Big Top
right this moment

I thank God for that
because a half hour ago
all hell was breaking loose
nobody was listening to me, and
I was an evil Mom because I was "making" the clowns eat CORN!
oh. the. horror.

I don't know what that was, but I liked it

2009-10-02T08:55:00.005-05:00

Earlier this week, I was having one of those "low battery" days. I just felt a bit run down, but was doing well overall.

I had a dentist appointment scheduled for the afternoon--something I never like doing. I also had to get a few time-sensitive tasks accomplished first thing at work. These were my thoughts when Buddy came into my room to tell me his eye hurt. The eyelid and surrounding skin was inflammed, but the eye itself looked ok--not goopy or crusty. I crossed my fingers and sent him to school. Now the need to get certain work tasks done first thing was even more urgent.

As the day progressed, I began dreading the dentist visit more and more. That was an underlying thought all morning. "I don't want to go to the dentist."

At lunchtime, I had made a decision to pick up something for lunch, but I kept thinking what I would really like something warm. Something like scrambled eggs. That was an underlying thought all morning ("I wish I had some scrambled eggs" that and "I wish I didn't have to go out in this weather"). On my way out of the building, I stopped in the lunchroom for a Coke and lo and behold, there were the castoff leftovers from a morning meeting -- a pan with several egg wraps from a local restaurant.

SCORE! I nuked two and my tummy was happy. The universe had delivered lunch to me! Woo!

The afternoon wore on, I made my way down my to-do list, and my dentist appointment got closer and closer. I had just returned to my desk after brushing my teeth when the phone rang. Buddy's after school teacher called to say that his eye is looking worse she thought I might want to have a doctor look at it.

Afraid that his eye would be worse the following morning, or that the school would tell me I needed to take him to the doctor before he could return the following day, I called the doctor. SCORE! I was able to get Buddy in within the hour -- IF I moved my dentist appointment. BONUS! Dentist appointment moved to Monday night where it won't interfere with my workday.

Doctor said Buddy didn't have pink eye, but maybe an allergic reaction. (Two days later and his eye looks completely recovered - YAY!). She gave us a note that he could return to school the following day. SCORE! He was going to be ok, there was a doctor's note to back that up, and I wouldn't have to take the following day off work. (I have to carefully budget my remaining paid time off for the rest of the year, and want to take as little time off for doctor appointments as possible.)

I'm not sure if the universe was just taking pity on me, if these unexpected blessings were the work of fate or God or what. All I knew was that it was all perfectly timed.

The kicker? I openly asked the universe for a cookie. I did not get a real cookie. I did, however, get an email from a coworker saying her daughter was going to be making chocolate bliss cupcakes this week, and would I want to place an order.

Amen, baby. Amen.

Off the top of my head

2009-09-15T17:30:00.002-05:00

Some snark
Kanye - Just shut up and go away. If you can't say anything nice...
Whitney - Good Lord, you too, ya damn drama queen. GO AWAY.
Jay - Hey, thanks for the 9pm central show on NBC EVERY. WEEKNIGHT. I'm sure to get to bed earlier now.

Some funny
SweetPea from upstairs: Mommy!
Hubs: What?
SweetPea: Not you Mommy! The other Mommy!

Punkin: Are all boys annoying and weird?!
Me: Yes. Look at your Daddy.
Punkin: Oh. Right. (Ha!)

Me: I don't like that Jay Leno is on every weeknight now. I want my shows back.
Hubs: *blah blah something about more people will watch Jay Leno and cost of production vs ONE one-hour drama blah blah blah*
Me: Yeah. I don't care. I like my 9pm shows. I want them back. I think you should send NBC a strongly worded email on my behalf.
Hubs: *?*

Other
Patrick Swayze died? Aw damn.

I like Jodi Picoult books, but if you're the mother of a five year old boy with a slight speech impediment, perhaps "Perfect Match" isn't the book for you.

Taylor Swift - I used to think you were just "Guitar Barbie", but I'm liking you more these days. So far, you're ok for my kid to look up to. P.S. Kanye is an ass -- oh, but you already knew that.

Punkin: Mom, I think there may be a school dance coming up. It's going to be so much fun!
Me: *gulp--I'm not ready for this*

Two new favorite sites:
Gives Me Hope
Operation Beautiful

What the heck is going on with my bangs?! Sheesh. I really need a haircut.

Ok... now I need to get dinner ready for the Circus...

So very random -- no, really.

2009-09-10T07:35:00.000-05:00

Fog City baby, and I'm not just talkin' about mah head.

Heard today:
So, you learned how to speak dog?

Sweet Pea upon just waking up:
Mom, you could at least let me go to the bathroom before you wake me up.

Either allergies, or a head cold are making me feel a little loopy and tired this morning. (Yes, that's my story and I'm stickin' to it. Shush) It's the kind of feeling where I just *know* that copious amounts of caffeinated sugar will definitely make me feel better. Do you ever feel that way?

I was SO tired when I woke up this morning. I don't think I stirred all night. When the alarm went off this morning, I was sure that it was someone else's alarm. I clearly remember thinking "Wow, someone's alarm sure is loud. If that's Punkin's alarm, she should be getting up now." Uh-huh. Yeah, that pretty much sums up my day so far -- not that I'm having a bad day, because I'm not.

The kids and Hubs all got to where they needed to be and I drove off into the fog, singing along with the radio. I'm a bit more alto than soprano today because of the cold/allergies, but it's all good.

Random word for the day: Ducksnort. Honestly. Where the heck did that come from? It just popped into my head this morning. I don't think I've ever heard a duck snort. Have you?

Oooohhh... today is gonna be good. I can just feel it. At least the crabbiness from earlier this week is gone. That's a good thing.

You know, on second thought, this could be from the cold medicine I took last night. I thought I took it with plenty of time for it to be out of my system before now, but apparently not.

Maybe I should have stayed home today and slept this off... and I would have...if I had been thinking clearly. On the other hand, if I had been thinking clearly, I wouldn't have needed to stay home.

You know what would have been good? Peppermint Hot Cocoa from Starbucks.

Hey! Hi! How are you today?!

Calling it

2009-08-26T08:32:00.002-05:00

There have been a lot of times this week when I feel as though I am barely holding myself together.

Forget focusing too much on any one thing -- my brain is working full speed ahead on making sure the clowns have what they need, and that everything is ready for them to start the school year.

Supplies. Check
Backpacks. Check
Lunch boxes. Check
Lunch tickets. Check
New shoes. Check
New clothes. Check
Emergency phone numbers. Check. Check.

My work schedule has been impacted from all the last minute before school preparations, and I'm pretty sure I'm in the negatives now for paid time off.

We've met the teachers.
We've attended the orientations.
We know the before school routine.
We have the after school routine planned out.

I've done some of my assigned pre-start-of-school homework, and will do more tonight.

There will be long, hot soaking baths for each clown to scrub off any last remaining bits of summer vacation. After that, the first-day-back-to-school outfit will be chosen and laid out for the morning.

There is a meeting I'll be catering at work this week. I finally made all the catering arrangements for that yesterday. In the morning, I'll have to remember to pick up the breakfast food on the way in to work.

The clowns are all pretty excited about getting back to school. Sweet Pea is happy that Ms. W is her teacher again, and couldn't be more enthusiastic about the "awesome classroom!"

I've been attempting to eat better, and get some regular exercise, and I've been doing ok, but this week, I'm definitely off that wagon. I can't focus on it.
My mind and my heart are elsewhere.

This week, my oldest clown goes into middle school.

My youngest clown goes into kindergarten.

As much as I'm happy about them reaching these milestones, I don't know that I'm ready. There's so much I still want to teach them, show them, and I know that I still have time, but time is moving by so fast--What if I don't get all the lessons in before they go? What if I forget something?

So, this week I will take the first-day-of-school photos, give big hugs, tell them I love them and caution them to "make good choices" before making sure they get to where they need to be.

Then, I will reluctantly go to where I need to be.
And try not to think about those yesterdays when they were so little that they could and would sleep a snuffily kind of soft baby sleep on my shoulder.

This week, I'm going through the motions, keeping busy, trying not to think too much and calling it all a wash before it's even halfway done. I'm allowed.

- - - - - - - -

This post brought to you by Being a Mom, Parenthood, and the by the letter "Shut up, I am *not* crying. I have allergies."

Past Time

2009-08-14T19:30:00.000-05:00

Back in 2000, after lots of support and assistance, I bought my mycircuslife domain and started up my online journal. I loved it. I loved having my own little space on the internet to prattle on about my first little clown, and later, the other two clowns. When I got a digital camera, I loved having the ability to put the photos up on my own little space and link to them and upload graphics and use them for my web designing, etc.

Here we are, nine years down the road and there are so many options now for photos and blogs and such!

I love the internet friends I’ve made along the way, and wouldn’t give up having a space on the internet for anything.

On the other hand, I have also had my domain site been declared an “attack site” at least twice now, to say nothing of the amount of spam comments I get when my blog is on my domain. It’s annoying as hell and takes time that I don’t have so much of any more to fix.

After some consideration, I’ve come to the conclusion that I am going to give up my mycircuslife domain, and go back to having this blog. I’ll apologize to you now for moving the blog back and forth and back and forth. This will be the last time I move the blog. I still want to be on the internet, and having my own domain just isn’t necessary for me anymore.

I’m not sure quite how this is going to work yet — I would still like to be able to have somewhere ‘flexible’ to keep my photos. (Does Flickr allow for uploading graphics and using those graphics in blog designs?)

Thank you all so much for continuing to ‘follow’ me and my circus ramblings. I am truly grateful that you all continue to read my online writings and comment, and have been patient with following me back and forth. I really appreciate that.

I'll be back here soon. I just need to pack up a few more boxes over at the old place, shut off the lights and lock the door on my way out.

Thanks again for sticking with me.

Moving Back

2009-08-14T18:01:00.001-05:00

I'm moving the blog back here, from mycircuslife.com.

Check out the full story there.

Sorry for the inconvenience. Really I am.

A Comeback

2009-08-13T15:41:00.002-05:00

I'm seriously considering cancelling my .com and just moving back to Blogger.

My .com was slammed by spam and labeled an "attack site". Gah. I don't write as much as I used to. I had been sort of keeping the site as a place to store photos, but I could probably just use Flickr. It would be cheaper.

Anywhoober... I'm considering it.

If I'm not here, I'm over at mycircuslife.com.
Or Twitter under "CircusKelli"

Moving

2009-02-12T16:12:00.000-06:00

I'm here ( http://mycircuslife.com/ ) if you're looking for me.

C'mon over!

Lazy Blogging

2009-02-03T11:22:00.001-06:00

Holy Blog Of Doom, Batman! I just got a bajillion whiny emails saying I have not updated this since people stopped clapping and Tinkerbell died... You would not believe how hard it is being waited on hand and foot and generally lounging around. Apologies to my regular readers! Even the little blue ones!

I am hopped up on caffeine with feeding the little people, being distracted by the shiny, and just generally being an embarrassment to society in general. My day seems to involve the authorities from the second I am woken by murderous Teletubbies to 11pm at which point I fall asleep on the couch. I am avoiding recapture. Can't they see I am blogging?!

I totally promise I will make more of an effort to blog more often until the nice men in the white coats come back. What? Unless of course the pool with the cocktail bar is heated!

- - - - - - - - -
If you're wondering WTF?! Go here: http://www.aussiebloggers.com.au/blogpost.html and give it a whirl! It's fun!

Moving

2009-02-02T12:51:00.005-06:00

At some point in the (possibly near) future, I will be moving my blog over to www.mycircuslife.com in the hopes that I actually make use of the domain I've owned for nearly 9 years now. (And hey! "Using features my site host has me paying for anyway!" What a concept!)

So... yeah... there ya go. That's what's happening.

Time for me to get off my proverbial behind and make some changes - hopefully, they'll be for the better.

Update:
First, I want to figure out how to change that template. THEN, I'll consider moving.
It's easier to redecorate before you move in, yes?

Circus Life Moments # 3

2009-01-24T11:15:00.003-06:00

After tying Buddy's shoes for him this morning, I cinched him in closer for a hug. He gave a sincere and fabulous squeeze. Feeling the love, I squeezed him back and told him that was the best hug I had gotten all day.

He walked away, then turned back and said "God sent me that hug, Mom."

I smiled and thought, "No, He sent ME that hug."

A Personal Political Epiphany

2009-01-20T08:53:00.002-06:00

I am a coward.

I am not a very political person, and I hardly ever talk about my personal political preferences.

I am always afraid that I do not know enough about the situation, and that I will come off looking like an idiot if I become engaged in discussion about the "issues" -- mostly because I do not know very much about them. I also do not want to offend anyone, or get into a heated debate.

Politics were never a topic of conversation while I was growing up. I couldn't tell you if my Mom even voted. There are prejudices instilled in me while I was growing up that I struggle with/against daily. I think all or at least most of us do. I've long felt that voting for a President was really choosing "the lesser of two evils."

Although today is the inaguration, I've pretty much stayed away from all the coverage. I've never been one to get caught up in all that hoopla. The idea of being amongst all those people in Washington, DC right now gives me the heebie jeebies. That is WAY too many people in one place.

Back in November, I reluctantly voted for McCain because I figured the "old white guy" would win in the end, rather than vote for Obama - the one I considered the underdog. "He'll never win, there are too many people who would be all bent out of shape with an African-American in the White House." -- What the hell kind of thinking was that, anyway?

Truthfully, I think its pretty cool that Obama won. Not only for the history factor and how far African-Americans have come, but because I have a sense of "Ok, now we'll get some positive change going here." I think Obama has some serious potential to do that. Maybe he won't be perfect, but hell, who is? Too many people only see the color of his skin. He got into the office just like every other former President did -- on promises. Some will be broken, some may not measure up, but can we not just suspend our judgement and believe in him for a while and see how it all shakes out?

You may think I have been taken in by those pretty promises of "Change" and "Hope" -- is it wrong to feel hopeful? Honestly, I think this country needs some change -- even if I can't yet articulate exactly what that change should be.

And that is something I will be working on.

Good Luck, President Obama.

Happy (delayed) New Year

2009-01-12T18:43:00.000-06:00

In an effort to skip the fact that 2009 has not been great so far, I decided my new year would start last night. Get that last week and a half OUTTA HERE. Hubby's Dad passing, my not feeling well, the house in chaos because of the painting... then Friday night, Sweet Pea was sick. Whatever it was, it left her system pretty quickly -- by lunch time on Saturday she was her usual self, so that was good. Then, of course, last night, I started with a headache and some nausea... bleh. The headache remains now, but I'm hoping it succumbs to the medication ANY MINUTE NOW.

Still, if I start the new year today, I'm no different than anyone else who woke up to the new year with a headache/hangover, right?

There is some good stuff, though:
1) The house is slowly becoming somewhat orderly again. Christmas is all back in boxes, and I've reclaimed my livingroom and most of my diningroom and most of my kitchen. There are only a couple of things waiting on the diningroom table to be put in the family room when all the furniture gets back in place. Hubby is done painting in the kitchen/family room. Now he's handling the finishing touches like outlet covers, redoing the mantle, and eventually hanging some pictures.

The kitchen is pretty much back in order -- I'm just waiting for a valance that I've asked Bio-Mom to make (I've never really learned my way around a sewing machine), and for Hubby's tools/supplies, etc. on my desk to be replaced with my computer once again.

I love that my house is getting back to "normal" -- I feel more relaxed when things are in order.

2) We went to Bio-Mom's for "Christmas" last Saturday. I had called them earlier in the day to tell them about Sweet Pea and they insisted we come anyway (as long as Sweet Pea was improving -- and she was). We had a great time -- I always do when I'm there. It is always just so relaxed and fun. The kids love it there -- Grandpa Choo-Choo has a huge train set on the floor in the family room, and he lets the kids pretty much climb all over it and run the trains, etc. It is fun watching them all together.

We came home from Bio-Mom's with tons of butter cookies -- I LOVE butter cookies from the bakery. Oh, and I have a FABULOUS new pair of sunglasses. Classic. (Photo coming soon)

3) My headache did fade down to tolerable levels. Yay!

4) I was able to make the twice weekly speech class for Buddy run a "two-fer" today. I dropped him off at speech class, and then picked up the forms he needs to register for kindergarten. Making that little stop saved me from having to go tonight and do it.

5) This is THE last week of Buddy's speech therapy! YAY!

6) The sun was peeking out a bit today.

7) The Circus went out to dinner tonight, allowing me to take the evening off. Oh sure, there are things I probably should be doing, but I really don't want to.

At the moment, I'm torn between sitting here at the computer and sorting through photos, or just retiring to my favorite chair next to Hubby and vegging out with him.

All in all, this first day of *my* new year has turned out pretty well, in spite of the impending "doom" of a Blizzard Watch and a Winter Weather Advisory. Who knows what tomorrow will bring? For now, though, everything is fine.

More later...

Grandpa Rich

2009-01-08T17:25:00.003-06:00

"Rich was a good man."

I've heard that over and over the past few days. The thing is, he really was. Oh sure, he wasn't perfect (who is?), but he was a good man.

Born in May of 1941, Rich died Friday, January 2, 2009. He was 67 years old.

Honestly, I don't know that I knew Rich that well. To me, he did not seem to be very demonstrative with his feelings. He was quiet -- kind of a "still waters run deep" kind of guy from what I knew of him. He never really said much to me, but I do remember him surprising me with a sentimental and sincere phrase or two while we danced at our wedding reception back in 1991.

Rich did what he could to balance the responsibilities of his "first" family -- MIL and three children, with that of the family he gained when he remarried. It wasn't always easy for him, but I believe he was proud of the things his children accomplished. He (and MIL) raised some fine people.

Rich loved his grandchildren -- Punkin, Sweet Pea, Buddy and Emme. He would get a little silly with them, and teased every one of them at one time or another with "I'm going to get yer gizzard!" There were photos of him playing in a sandbox with them, blowing out birthday candles, wearing a fuzzy-feathered tiara, holding a magic wand, and surrounded by his grandchildren.

In 2006, Rich was diagnosed with esophageal cancer. At one point early in 2007, the doctors were unsure that he would live another two months. He rallied and surprised all of us by making it back from that. The diagnosis had an impact on us all, and his children tried harder to be there for him -- to connect more with him.

A year or so ago, Rich, Hubby and Buddy all went to Rochelle, IL to watch the trains. It was a rare event, and Hubby will always remember that as one of the best days he spent with his Dad. Rich liked trains and would frequently share his Train magazines with Buddy (who refuses to part with any of those issues).

Rich was "fighting the good fight", doing what he needed to do to get through the ups and downs of his treatment. Over the last few months however, his peaks and valleys began to become more pronounced. The valleys became more difficult to climb out of.

He was once again admitted to the hospital on Christmas Eve with an infection. Rich was able to come home from the hospital on New Years Eve with Hospice care for the evenings. However, early in the morning of January 2, 2009, Rich's breathing became shallow. He passed away shortly after 2am, joining his mother, father, and four brothers who had already gone before him. He leaves behind a sister, three brothers, three children, four grandchildren, a host of other family members and many friends.

Rich, you were a good man. We take comfort knowing that you are finally at peace, and not plagued by the burdens you had when you were here. We will always remember you.

Love ya, Rich.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Rich surprised me once by commenting on something I wrote on my blog. While my family and friends know about my blog, I don't believe a lot of them read it. (Perhaps they get enough of me in real life...) After I conquered the ability to make an edible grilled cheese sandwich, I vividly remember him asking me "So... what are you going to do now that you've done that?" I laughed and told him I wasn't sure, and to 'stay tuned'.

Thank you for the prayers you may have said on our family's behalf and good thoughts you have expressed. We appreciate every one of them.

Tell me its true...

2009-01-08T07:37:00.000-06:00

I've had a shower.
My hair is "done".
I'm wearing makeup, high heels, dress pants and a nice shirt.
This appears to be a full day of work for me.
The clowns are all at school for the whole day.
Hubby is at work for the whole day.
There is a run in my knee highs.

OH "NORMAL"!!! HOW I'VE MISSED YOU!!!

Tuesday night

2009-01-06T19:20:00.003-06:00

My FIL's burial will be on Wednesday, January 7. The little clowns will be coming with us. I'm hoping the weather will not be too bad. The two littlest ones already have colds, and Hubby is getting over a cold, too.

The wake was a few days ago, and it was a very long day for all of us.

Monday and Tuesday I went to work for half-days. Monday afternoon, I did my best to bring some more order to the chaos that is my house. I made very little progress, while Hubby rested. Tonight, Hubby is working on putting the kitchen back together, and I'm contemplating parking myself in my chair and not moving. His day to recuperate from the effects of the last few days was yesterday. I'm hoping mine is tonight.

On top of all the emotional stuff lately, I slipped on some ice Sunday morning and banged myself up pretty good. My knee is scraped up and bruised, and my back and neck are sore. My stomach isn't happy with me either. I've also discovered that eating "anything I want" for a few weeks will smack me in the gut when I try to get back to eating healthier. That'll teach me, huh?

2009 is just not starting out so great here at the Circus, but I'm hopeful that everything will clear up and get back to routine, or what passes for normal around here after the next couple of days.

Awake On A Sunday

2009-01-04T09:51:00.003-06:00

Punkin is stalling on getting upstairs to take a shower, and the two little clowns are in their Halloween costumes running around the first floor.

I'm down in the basement office where Hubby moved my computer temporarily while he paints on the first floor. There are paint supplies/tools all over my kitchen "desk", the refrigerator is pulled out for maintenance, the items that are normally on my kitchen counters are stacked all over the floor in the foyer, the family room furniture is still in the middle of the room surrounded by ladders and other tools, and all the Christmas-y and non-seasonal knick knacks from the family room are stacked willy-nilly all over the dining room.

Uh-oh... the kids are quiet...

Ah. That didn't last long. Here comes Buddy the Transformer...

Anyway...

Today is the wake for my Father-In-Law, Rich. He lost his battle with cancer last Friday morning. I got up early this morning to shower and have some time to myself before having to get started getting everything ready for this afternoon. We're bringing the three clowns to the wake, and plan on stashing them in the little "room" with toys, coloring books, some snacks, and a couple of movies to keep them busy. I need to get that all together, hem Buddy's pants, and make sure everyone is dressed and ready to go by 12:30pm.

I have no idea what today will bring, and I can tell you that I'm already feeling stressed...

Ok... two littles have discovered I was having some quiet time and are in here putting a stop to that. Time for me to get a move on.

More later.

Happy New Year!

2009-01-01T20:05:00.002-06:00

They say that what you're doing New Year's Eve is an indication of what the next year will be like for you...

Hubby has been painting the family room and kitchen -- I've been taking some "before/during" photos and will post them when I'm able to add "after" to them.

I love that he's doing this on his time off from work this past week!! I'm also starting to get a bit "itchy" (without a "B") about having the kitchen, dining room and family room all torn apart. These three rooms are in total chaos with all the painting tools/supplies, outlet covers strewn about, kitchen counter items moved hither and yon, and random holiday decorations piled "out of the way". Hubby even had to move my computer down to his office so I wouldn't go into withdrawals while he's painting. It is all starting to mess with my need to have things orderly. You would think the clowns have cured me of that by now, but no.

If the rest of the year goes like this, I'll either be cured of what little "order" I crave, or I'll be in the looney bin.

Stay tuned...

Merry Christmas - 2008

2008-12-24T22:28:00.001-06:00

Christmas morning update:
Present wrappings all over the livingroom
Stockings ransacked
One toy already broken
Pancakes, bacon and sausage made and consumed until all clowns are stuffed.
Lil Buddy just asked me if I was pregnant. Heh, thanks kid.

We leave in 90 minutes to go visit the families. I'd best get a move on.

On the 26th, I rest. That'll be my present to me.

Sunday Update

2008-12-14T15:32:00.002-06:00

Still running around like I have a bee in my bonnet, getting some things accomplished and looking ahead to other events happening between now and the end of the year.

So far, we've had Punkin's birthday party and Buddy's birthday party. (I've posted photos of the fabulous cakes Bio-Mom made over on Flickr.) The kids did the Christmas decorating this year around the Circus home, and it looks pretty good.
We have also had the annual visit with Santa at the mall.

All in all, things have been going along smoothly.

This week, we'll have a preschool program to go to (I think), and band performance, and a park district holiday program.

I'm still working on my shopping lists and my Christmas cards, but we're all hanging in there.

Right now, I'm off to ignore the mess in the kitchen and take a little nap for a bit before dinner. I vote for leftover party food. I'm sure the kids will veto that, though.

More later... take care until then.

It's Happening Again...

2008-12-05T09:33:00.005-06:00

'Tis the season...

Buddy's birthday party
School band concerts and holiday programs
Decorations to put up
Christmas cards to write (both for work and home)
Holiday shopping to be done
Presents to wrap

On top of

The everyday running to and fro
and the daily household stuff
and the daily work stuff

Looking back at last year's posts from this time, I'm in the same place I was then.

My Spirit is less than festive. I feel scattered and tired and I seem to be forgetting things lately.

I haven't learned anything in the last year. I haven't made any changes to make this season better than last. That's discouraging.

I've been told

2008-11-23T20:10:00.003-06:00

During a very busy couple of days, and smack in the middle of Punkin's birthday party with the family, SIL and Hubby mentioned that I need to update this blog.

Hey. Guys.

I updated it.

S'ok?

Life is comin' at me a little too fast this past week. Between day-long meetings to 'hostess' at work, a birthday party for Punkin, flu shots for the entire circus, physical exams and speech therapy for Buddy, and the birth of my nephew (not to mention the weight of the holiday preparations on my shoulders), I've been a little overwhelmed.

I should have a chance to breathe for a bit this coming holiday weekend. I hope to write something vaguely wordy and potentionally mildly interesting (hopefully) for this space soon.

Sit tight. It's on my list.

Anyone for leftover cake and lasagna?

Buddyflies

2008-11-14T23:05:00.004-06:00

There were a couple of days this past work week that felt like I was slogging through molasses during a much colder than normal day in January. One day in particular this week, I jammed the big shredder, and hit my head on the wall when I leaned down to try to clear the jam -- and that was the highlight of my day. Somehow, I made it through the day without any further injury to any other beings, mechanical or human, and arrived at preschool to pick up Buddy. As is routine, I collected his coat and any paperwork and/or drawings he accomplished during the day.

This is what greeted me:

(click for larger version)

And, for the first time during that really long day, a genuine smile crept across my face.

Lil Old Lady

2008-11-10T20:19:00.002-06:00

One morning last month, I took the two little clowns to the eye doctor. Thankfully, both children behaved (for the most part) and cooperated with the doctor.

On the way back from the eye doctor's office, I accidentally bumped into the car in front of me. I was going all of about 2.5 miles an hour, if that, when the kids told me to look at something. Misjudging the distance between the car in front of me and the EFMommyvan, I looked away and very slowly rolled to the tapping point.

WELL

This little old lady in the car in front of me throws her hands up in the air, puts her car in park and gets out. I parked the EFMommyvan, and got out already apologizing and thinking "oh crap!! I'll be late to work, how fun with the kids in the car!!"

Me: I'm so sor--
OL: What's wrong with you?! What's your problem?! If you're going to stop, STOP! *checking her rear bumper*
Me: I'm very sorry. There d--
OL: What's wrong with you?! *getting back in her car* JERK!!
Me: Have a nice day. *getting back in my car*

And don't you know my kids were VERY interested in discussing her.

Clowns: "Mommy? Why did she call you a jerk? You're not a jerk. She's a jerk. That wasn't very nice."
Me: "We don't call people names."

I told the kids it was my fault, I should have paid attention to where I was going, and she had a right to be mad at me.

Wouldn't you know, the light changes and we end up sitting next to her at the traffic light. I didn't look at the woman. Instead, I kept one eye on the traffic signal, and was talking to the kids about the lady. "She had a right to be mad at me, but she didn't have to say that. It doesn't matter what she says to me, or thinks of me. She must be having a bad day."

Then, Sweet Pea says "Mommy, she just put her middle finger up at me... why did she do that?"

"She did WHAT?"

And with that, the light changed again and she drove away with her incredibly bad mood.

How's this?

2008-11-10T18:47:00.004-06:00

Ok... I found this template in my blog files and thought I would resurrect it... or post it for the first time. I can't remember if I've used this one before or not, but I was getting tired of the colored pencils. I realize the font is a little larger than it has been. Oh well. This'll do for now.

Original photo was taken by my dear friend Doug.

If you see something that isn't working on the blog, please let me know.

(I slapped this template together and posted it while I should have been eating dinner...)

So... how's things by you?

Thursday Night Drive By

2008-11-06T17:36:00.003-06:00

Crazy, goofy, busy, odd week...

I'm feeling better after the two absolutely very awful days of sinus headache and a trip to the doctor. Thank goodness!

I've missed two days of work, and have been running the little clowns to and fro and today was in an all day meeting that required set up and hostessing and food set up and clean up and taking notes and meeting clean up and my feet hurt and I'm achey and my comfy clothes just couldn't feel any better right now.

Friday is another day of running the boy clown to and from speech therapy in the middle of the day and I have lists in my head of all the stuff I need to do today, tomorrow, this week, next week, this month and next month and things I'd like to do with decorating the house and tinkering with photos I've taken and maybe putting them in frames and hanging them up around the house and boy it would be lovely to paint this first floor and someday maybe, golly, wouldn't it be grand to not have to sit in a broken down folding lawn chair when I watch television downstairs in the basement and oh yeah, the laundry needs attention, and I've got birthday thank you notes to write, too...

Um, so yeah... I've been interrupted about a half dozen times by three little clowns and I probably should think about making dinner for the circus but it would be oh so much better to have someone else do it and you can just forget about me getting on that damned exercise bike anytime this week and there's the chili cookoff at the neighbor's on Saturday to think about...

What was I saying?

Eeww... Sweet Pea just gave me some weird lemony-limey-minty tic tacs. Bleh.

Anywhoober... I'm feeling better (thank you all for your advice!!) and I'm scattered in a few different directions right now, but I'll be back soon. I think. Maybe... because I'm also really tired of this blog design and I'd like to change that...

*mumbling* dinner... what to make for dinner...

Please tell me

2008-11-04T07:36:00.004-06:00

Day two of sinus headache.
Tired of them. They hurt.
Can't focus, but I'm giving work a shot again.
Left work early on Monday because of this.
Headache, nausea, just want to sleep.
Calling the doctor when they open at 8:30am.

Need advice.

What do you do to rid yourself of a sinus headache?

Anything you can suggest would be great.

Leave your remedy in the comments, or email me.

Thank you so very much.

Celebrating 40

2008-10-30T08:36:00.003-05:00

After anticipating this birthday for a year, planning my adventure for six months, and celebrating for damn near two months, I am now officially 40 years old. YAY!!

My coworker, "Mo", made sure my day did not go by unnoticed. She went to a lot of trouble to announce my birthday and age to the entire company* with signs "all over the building" and dozens of black balloons and a fantastic cake. She even 'reminded' my boss. She's awesome, and I truly appreciated all of it.

I took a few pictures (and added notes and comments to them) and posted them over here. Enjoy!

* Unlike Sweet Pea who merely told everyone she came into contact with at her school and around the neighborhood (including hollering to our neighbors over our backyard fence) that her Mom would be turning FORTY!

Insert BIG HUGE SMILE here -- * Updated!

2008-10-18T10:57:00.010-05:00

I've added words to the picture...

I may just leave this photo here for a while...

*grinning*

And now... actual words:
Long story, short -- Six months ago, not really needing any material possessions*, I decided what I wanted for my 40th birthday.

I wanted an adventure, an experience. I wanted to meet Trace Adkins, shake his hand, talk to him for a moment or two, and somehow make a difference to him. I wanted a fantastic memory.

If nothing else, I knew the "ride to try" would be fun.

As a result of that birthday wish, I went on a fabulously crazy road trip to Nashville with Erika, saw Trace and Martina McBride perform at the Grand Ole Opry, attended two concerts (one with Erika and one with Aunt Jeri), saw Alan Jackson, Jason Michael Carroll, James Otto and Craig Morgan -- four performers I had never seen live before! -- as well as Trace Adkins, had my first shot of Jack Daniels, laughed my fool head off, met Trace Adkins not once, but TWICE, got a photograph of both meetings, got an autograph, and, for a few minutes, I made a difference.**

This birthday has been so much fun... truly. Everyone should do something crazy silly like this at least once. I owe Aunt Jeri and Erika a huge thank you for the support and encouragement and tolerance for my behavior the past few months. You ladies are awesome.

You know what the best thing is? My birthday isn't until next week! Anything celebratory that happens now in honor of my 40th birthday is just ice cream on the cake! Mmmm... ice cream... cake...

All the photos that turned out somewhat clear can be seen here

* then again, who doesn't love presents?!

** during one of the songs at the Milwaukee, WI concert, the audience held up paper cut out hearts (made by another member of the fan club). Trace and the band did not expect that, and the look of surprise and appreciation on their faces was very cool. I really felt like I (and the other audience members) made a difference to the guys on stage.

"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars." -- Les Brown

Much better

2008-10-07T08:55:00.003-05:00

This morning, after being awakened by the single most annoying song you could play at 4:30 in the morning EVER, I lay in bed, my mind wandering. (Because there is no way I am getting my ass out of bed at 4:30am unless the house is on fire or we are going on a "leave in the middle of the night" vacation)

My thoughts settled on the little clowns.

Punkin - 10 years old, almost 11. As tall as I am. Sweet, funny, smarter than she realizes. She has a good heart. She can't raise her eyebrow, or do an "Elvis lip", but she can curve her tongue into a "hot dog bun". Something I could never do.

Sweet Pea - 6 years old. A sprite, an imp. Spunky. Smart, funny. She's kind of the peanut of the three. I'm convinced she was born without a "filter". If she thinks something, it pops right out of her mouth. She certainly makes life interesting. She always wants the extra hugs and kisses, and has started saying "I love you too, Mommy" even before I say "I love you" first.

Buddy - 4 years old. His temperment is a nice blend of Punkin's laid-back approach and Sweet Pea's 'in your face' earnestedness. He's not a big fan of playing on his own, and adores his big sisters. He's a cuddle-bug, yet he can be so very stubborn.

As Hubby got ready for his day, I heard the pitter patter of little feeties entering our room. I do what I always do -- pretend to be asleep, and try to figure out, without opening my eyes, if it was Buddy or Sweet Pea. The little clown climbed up in our bed, and got comfortable on Daddy's side before I could figure it out. I heard the tell tale noise of Buddy 'chewing' the inside of his cheek before he drifted back off to sleep for a few moments.

All too soon, Sweet Pea was in our room as well, the two of them lying on top of me in an attempt to keep me from getting up and starting my day. It was so tempting, the thought of staying all nice and coccooned amongst the pillows and blankets with the two cuddly little people.

Instead, I managed to struggle free of the warm blankets and a hundred pounds of clowns, thanking the powers that be for bringing them into my life. And for warm blankets and squishy pillows.

State of the CircusKelli

2008-10-03T08:12:00.002-05:00

Things I can't do right:
Keep my house clean
Remain even-keeled
Be an even-handed, consistent, effective parent
Be fun to be around
Focus on what needs to be done, and then do it

This weekend:
I'll clean the house as best as I can
I'll hold my tongue when I want to shout
I'll be happy and outgoing when I want to hide
I'll get back to reading one of the parenting books I have
I'll follow the suggestions in the parenting books I have

Things will look better on Monday. Maybe I'll have a different list then. One of things I can do right...

State of the Circus

2008-09-28T12:55:00.005-05:00

No recent road trips, no major dramas, not much has changed here at the Circus for a week or so.

Right now, the clowns are "cleaning up the playroom", Hubby is watching a Bears game and I'm sitting here deciding if I want to sneak out of the house to run errands on my own, start looking through the stack of catalogs for Christmas/birthday shopping, start a new book or make some lunch.

(Blogging wasn't on that list, but that's what I've landed on for now)

I spent most of the day cleaning yesterday in preparation for the baby shower I'm hosting for my sister this coming Saturday. I accomplished quite a bit, and am now realizing I spent all my cleaning ambition yesterday. That means, of course, that I'll be stressing myself out later this week as the date nears to get "EVERYTHING" done.

The house is quiet right now with everyone in the basement, and I like that things are straightened and in order (even if not white glove test clean). It's the type of day/moment where I just want to sit and read a book -- and I just might.

Errands are tapping me on the shoulder though, reminding me I need to go to the grocery store, and do a bit of shopping for the party.

Uh oh. Sweet Pea just came up asking for lunch and telling me I have to go see how clean the playroom is. So much for sneaking out of the house to run errands undetected or sitting down to read a book or nap. (Because napping is always an option)

I know, I know... a rambling post. No, I couldn't really come up with anything better. It's been busy at work, busy at home, and it will be busy from now until Christmas. We're getting into the Circus' "busy season" with the birthdays and holidays and shopping and baby shower and all the other fun that's planned. It will be a good time, but a busy one.

And now Punkin is up here, too.

I'm pretty much just coasting along today, only accomplishing as much as I need to, and trying to carve out some time for "me" in the process.

I hope all is going well with you. I haven't had much time to read or comment on blogs, but I hope to get back to it soon.

Another Circus Road Trip

2008-09-21T21:58:00.003-05:00

Friday morning, Hubby called and said "I'm thinking about taking the clowns up to Dearborn, Michigan to see the Henry Ford Museum and Greenfield Village this weekend. We'd leave early Saturday morning, spend the night up there and come back Sunday. What do you think?"

I thought it was a great idea. A fun adventure.

We did NOT tell the clowns our exact plans. We only said we were going to do something fun this weekend. I washed and folded laundry, packing a change of clothes for all of us from what was freshly washed. Hubby set the alarm for way too early o'clock in the morning, and we enjoyed waking the clowns early on the weekend, instead of them waking us.

We left around 4:00am (yup, 4:00am), and made it to Dearborn, MI around 11:00am. I tried to stay awake for Hubby on the trip up there, but dozed off and on for nearly the entire ride.

Punkin had been to The Henry Ford Museum and Greenfield Village before, but she did not remember much about that visit -- she was just barely four years old at the time.

Our Circus family wandered are the museum for a while, taking in all there was to see. We saw this and this and this and this and this. I was a bit heartbroken to learn I missed this by only a week, though. As we toured the museum, I snapped pictures while Hubby gave the clowns lessons on how some of the big machines worked and answered questions from the clowns.

After some rather expensive hot dogs, fries and beverages, we wandered over to Greenfield Village. There, we walked through all the different districts, looking at the old buildings and getting an idea for how life was "way back when." "Railroad Junction" was the biggest hit with the kids. We explored the old roundhouse before riding the train for a bit.

Around 4pm, we were all starting to lose some steam ourselves, so we said goodbye to "The Henry Ford", feeling that even though we saw a lot, there was still so much more that we didn't get a chance to explore. (The IMAX presentations of Nascar and Dinosaurs Live! would have been fun to see)

We found our hotel and promptly all sacked out for a bit before walking over to a nearby restaurant for dinner.

This morning, we the parents pretty much dozed through breakfast time -- although the clowns did routinely wake us up to check on us to be sure we weren't in a coma, bless their hearts. (Where *do* they get all their energy?!)

We were soon on our way home, making a stop for lunch along the way. Once back on home turf, we all kind of chilled until bedtime.

It was a fun adventure. The cars and trains were a big hit with the clowns, as was the "hat shop" where they all tried on various hats. I think we'll all sleep very well tonight.

Photos from the Circus' Henry Ford Museum/Greenfield Village weekend visit are here, if you're interested.

Around The Big Top

2008-09-17T20:39:00.002-05:00

One of us is playing with a long cardboard tube from a large roll of wrapping paper when we should be sleeping.

One of us is totally over the moon excited that she will be meeting Trace Adkins one month from today.

One of us thinks the other is a groupie (not to be confused with "grouper")

Earlier tonight, someone commented that the school lunch included yellow cake, then asked "And you know what color yellow cake is, right?!" Two of us answered "BLUE!" in unison.

Seriously

2008-09-11T08:22:00.000-05:00

I could never, EVER in a million years have expressed how I feel about 9/11 and politics and the election any better than this.

Hubby, Do NOT Read This

2008-09-05T21:46:00.006-05:00

Tonight, I took Punkin shopping for a gift for her friend's birthday party tomorrow.

Punkin is almost 11 years old, and is nearly as tall as I am. I am 5'6". There is something a little unsettling about being able to look your 10 year old in the eye. It's Hubby's genes, of course. My people are normal-sized. His people are Amazons. (And I mean that in the nicest possible way, really). I figure I'll be able to have Punkin get anything resting on the top shelf for me in a matter of weeks. Who needs step stools? Oh yeah... the two little clowns... but not for long, I'm afraid.

I've heard children grow up fast, and it's the truth. No matter how long you've been wanting them to stop whining, poop on the potty, and just grow out of whatever "not wonderful" stage they may be in, all of a sudden you blink and they're patting you on the head. (Nevermind if I did that to my Mother, that's not the point)

I get mired in and stressed out about the nitty gritty of being a Mom too often. Days go by and I suddenly realize I need to pay more attention, so I try to do that. I try to make sure I tell and show the kids how much I love them. I try to be a little more "gentle" with the directives. Sometimes it works for a bit; sometimes longer.

At work today, a co-worker "C" brought in her adorable little four month old baby girl. The little baby girl was dressed in pink, had a cap of light colored fuzz on her head, the bluest eyes, and no socks on her little feet. She kept gnawing on her fist and would smile very big for her Mommy.

As I held the little cutie pie, I realized I had begun to rock back and forth a little. The way I used to when the clowns were small. The blue eyes reminded me of Punkin's, and the pink outfit reminded me of something Sweet Pea used to wear.

I cuddled wit da widdle baby girl, and couldn't help making baby talk to her. She was so precious, yes she was, yes she was. So alert, but content as I held her. Just before I somewhat reluctantly gave her back to her Mom, I gave her a little hug, and kissed her on the back of her head, inhaling that baby smell.

"C" walked away with her little one and I sat down at my desk, grinning from ear to ear.

That was good, holding the baby. I remember those days fondly. The nights, though, not so much. I still remember walking the floors in the middle of the night with Sweet Pea until she was over nine months old. The years of sleep deprivation -- No, siree. I don't miss the nights at all.

So, tonight, I spent time shopping with Punkin, just the two of us. We stopped and looked at the baby clothes and things for my little nephew (to be born in November).

When we came home, I went into Sweet Pea's room to say goodnight to her and smiled at the fact that she was mumbling in her sleep while I kissed her. (She is no longer the incredibly light sleeper she was when she was a baby)

Buddy was still very much wide awake (and would be for more than an hour) and very appreciative of the toy I picked up for him at the store -- a $5 "Nano Blaster". Best five bucks I've spent in a while (although, I think I have to get one for Hubby now)

So yeah, I miss my cuddly, adorable, smiley babies. The way they used to smell so good, and gurgle and sleep all curled up in a warm, little ball on my shoulder... or, or the way I used to wrap them up in a blanket and call them "burrito baby".

Still, there's something to be said for the people they become after that baby stage, and the people they will become further down the road.

The Real Reason

2008-09-02T20:39:00.003-05:00

Tonight, as I swept and Swiffered the kid crud off the kitchen floor, assisted the boy clown with the effects of the 'virus taking the expressway out' of his body, and prewashed several pairs of little clown underwear, my mind wandered...

Oprah: So, Kelli. You've had a successful career, met and married a great guy and come further along than you ever thought possible when you were growing up the minority in that apartment complex in Rolling Ghettoes.

Me: (smiling) Yes, yes I have.

Oprah: What made you decide to start a family?

Me: Well, O -- may I call you "O"? -- like anyone else, I did it for all the glitz and glamour of being a Mom...

CircusKelli: Yearbooked

2008-08-30T13:14:00.012-05:00

Because Miss Susie Fairchild told me too...

1952

1954

1958

1964
One of my friends has
a bridesmaid's photo of me
where I look very much like this. Scary!

1968
The year I was born.
Very Mary Tyler Moore, isn't it?

1974
So, that's what I would look like
with completely straight hair...

1978

1982

1985

1986

Now, there was something else I was supposed to do... what was it??

40 Hours In Nashville

2008-08-27T14:43:00.013-05:00

Armed with MapQuest directions, an atlas, and enough homemade butter cookies and snacks for us to survive a week in a blizzard, we set off for Nashville.

One day last month, I had been surfing the internet and realized tickets to the Grand Ole Opry were pretty inexpensive. I realized this after I discovered Trace Adkins was playing there. I fired off an email to Erika with a simple question: "It would be crazy to make a road trip to Nashville just to see Trace Adkins at the Grand Ole Opry, right?" To my surprise, she didn't say no. Within the next half an hour, tickets to the show were purchased, and we had a girls weekend planned.

From that moment, I had been very much looking forward to this trip. Especially when I realized my last girls weekend was in 1996!!

At the very first toll booth, we were both struck by the overwhelming urge to enthusiastically announce to the attendant "We're going to NASHVILLE!" We were able to contain our excitement until the van window was rolled up before busting out with the announcement, then laughing about it. We were able to spare each and every toll booth attendant we encountered, but only barely. We did, however, make our announcement to passing cars and trucks (with the windows rolled up so only we could hear and laugh each time).

Early into the trip, we discovered I have the bladder of a chipmunk, and Erika is a camel. No matter, we still made good time getting to Nashville. We only ran into a little light rain, and some minor construction, arriving at our hotel around 4:00pm. We thought we made pretty good time.

Once we were in our room, we called home to say we arrived safely, then waited FOREVER for the shuttle to the mall. We thought we would try to get some souvenir shopping done, and eat a really nice sit down high-caloric fattening dinner. We didn't find any souvenirs we were willing to spend money on (although we did discover a "stalker saleslady" in one store, yikes!), and the only place that didn't have a long wait to be seated at that time was TGIFriday's. It was during dinner that Erika and I decided we could never ever be vegetarians. (GO MEAT!) It was also during dinner that I discovered you can take the Mom out of the house, but she's still a Mom in Nashville. Someone had dropped a couple of rib bones on the floor and left them there. No less than six people walked past them without picking them up. I was afraid someone would trip on them, so I took my napkin, scooped them up, then gave them to the waiter who was standing nearby. "These were on the floor". Erika laughed at me when I sat back down. What? That bugged me!

Our waitress was unintentionally funny ("I don't know anything about the capitals of the states up North--Chicago, being the capital of Illinois, was great when I was there!"). The poor dear was floored when she carded me and realized I was nearly 40 years old. I thought her eyeballs were gonna pop right out of her head.

By the time we finished walking the mall and eating dinner, the shuttle was done shuttling for the day, so we opted to walk back to the hotel. On the way over, the shuttle driver told us it was a "10 minute walk" from the mall to our hotel. We were staying literally right across the street from the Gaylord Opryland Complex -- all nine acres of it. It was a long, hot, "way more than 10 minutes" walk back to the hotel, but it served to aid in the digestion of our dinner. The walk also gave us an opportunity to see a few little shops we probably wouldn't have noticed otherwise. We made a note to check those places out the next day if there was time.

Before turning off the lights and saying "Good night, John Boy", (and after discovering the knobs on the bathroom sink worked 'backwards' Seriously! Backwards knobs? WTH?), we made our plan for Saturday, set the alarm and dozed off to dreamland. That was the first decent sleep I'd had in a week.

Saturday morning came early in spite of a good night's sleep. After Erika shut off the alarm, the first thing I said was "TODAY IS THE DAY I FULFILL MY DESTINY!" and then I laughed like a loon.

A couple of months ago, Erika asked me what I wanted for my birthday. After thinking about it for a moment, I said "I would like to meet Trace Adkins, shake his hand, and talk to him for a moment." I do believe her reply was "Wouldn't you like something easier, like a million dollars?"

Seriously now, I really do have all I'll ever need. I thought that "Trace Adkins wish" would be something fun, different, adventurous -- out of the ordinary.

I know, I know... I sound like a completely dorky FAN... gah! So sue me. Why not have a crazy dream for a little while? This girls weekend Thelma and Louise-esque road trip adventure to Nashville had turned into a chance to possibly "live the dream"-- be my "brush with celebrity." And, if it didn't work out that way, it would still be a whole helluva lotta fun, right?

When our fit of giggles ended, we got dressed, had breakfast and waited for Jerry the tour bus driver to pick us up for our "Homes of the Stars" bus tour. This trip to Nashville was nothing if not completely cheesy. Our tour included "a brief tour of the Historic District of downtown Nashville, including 2nd Avenue and the Ryman Auditorium. Then we are off to the land of the stars. You will enjoy a driving tour through the neighborhoods of the elite Country Music Artists who call Nashville their home..." Oh, hey! Trace's house just happens to be on the tour! Well, whaddaya know?!

Jerry the tour bus driver seemed very knowledgable about the area and the stars (who knows how much of it was b.s. but it was fun), and that's what we were there for. We didn't see any stars at any of their houses, even though we had heard that a couple of them sometimes come on the bus to say hello. Jerry the tour bus driver did tell us what kinds of cars some of the stars drive even! (We were on the lookout for Trace's pick up from that moment on. In fact, I think I've seen it three times since I got home...)

After the bus tour, we did some walking around and souvenir shopping. We went to Cooter's and the Wax Museum before going over to the Opry Shop and getting an idea of where we had to go later that night. We took a lot of pictures, then headed over to John A's for a late lunch/early dinner. Their sign promised "good food", and they delivered. Erika and I gave John A's restaurant the "best buns" award -- seriously the rolls they served with our meal were FABULOUS. The waitress was very nice, too. We asked her if she knew where the nearest Harley Davidson dealer was (more souvenir shopping) and she went so far as to draw us a map! We found the place with no problem at all. (I'm going to take a moment here to say that I never once got lost the whole trip. NOT ONCE.)

Once all of our souvenirs were purchased, we went back to the hotel to freshen up before the show. I had received an email before I left (I didn't take a laptop with me. A decision I regretted more than once over the weekend!) that there would be a fan club photo taken before the 7:00pm show. If any fan club members were going to be in the area, they could stop by and be in the photo and sign a card for Trace commemorating his five years with the Grand Ole Opry.

Yes, I'm 12. In an effort to "fulfill my destiny", I recently joined the Trace Adkins Fan Club. You can continue reading whenever you're done laughing.

So, it's hot and we're standing around waiting for a group of Trace fans to congregate and head in a particular direction. We spotted them, and Erika and I parted ways (they were checking membership cards -- Erika didn't have one, so they could not let her "in"). Erika went to find our seats, and I followed the group around to the back of the Grand Ole Opry. My ID was checked, I signed the card and then waited for what seemed like a long time. Erika called me on my cell phone at one point, but I had to go because we were starting to gather for the photo. I decided to stand by a man wearing a yellow shirt so I could find myself later in the photograph. As the Fan Club President gathered us, she announced "Now, we're going to take the picture from up there, so when Trace comes out look up for the picture. Also, he has a lot of people inside waiting for him, so he won't be able to sign autographs..."

(blink) Did I hear that right?

"When Trace comes out....?" Whoa. Now I REALLY wish Erika would have been with me!

We waited another few minutes and then he was there! Trace Adkins walked out of the Grand Ole Opry and came over to our group and stood with us and took a picture! Oh... that was too cool! I can be seen in the group picture, standing near a man wearing a yellow shirt, taking a picture of the back of Trace's head... and NOT looking up at the camera. (DORK!)

HE WAS STANDING RIGHT THERE!! OH MY GOODNESS!!

My inner 12 year old went into overdrive, and while I could stop myself from jumping up and down and chanting "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!", I couldn't do much of anything else. I remembered the note I wrote, though.

Yes. I wrote a fan note to Trace Adkins. (stop laughing) Why? Because, I know that I go all stupid when face to face with celebrity and I knew I wouldn't get a chance to have any kind of conversation with him, even if I could find my voice, and I didn't want to say anything idiotic, so I wrote it down.

After the last group picture was snapped, I quickly scooted myself around to the front of the pack, clutching my note in one hand, my camera in the other. Yellow Shirt Guy stopped Trace and talked to him for a moment (and I remembered to snap a couple of pictures, yay me!) while Striped Shirt "Security" Guy said something to me "I just want to hand Trace this note..." I said. Striped Shirt Guy said *he* would give it to Trace. HA! Over my dead body! Trace was within 10 feet of me. Not a chance Striped Shirt Guy. "No, thanks, I'll give it to him..." I turned and Trace was standing RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME. (eep!)

I took a deep breath, and my brain fell right outta my head. I held out my note to Trace and I may have said "Hi... this is for you." but I'm not really sure I said anything. He looked right at me (RIGHT AT ME) and said "Thank you very much" in that deep voice, and he smiled at me. I remember thinking "Wow... wow... he's got nice eyes..." I could smell his cologne (it was either his or Yellow Shirt Guy's cologne). My inner 12 year old passed out as Trace walked past. I turned to go, and put my hand on his arm. (Dude works out, jus' sayin'...)

He was caught up by other fan club members and I turned and casually walked away. For about 10 seconds. Then, I ran as fast as my killer-heeled boots would carry me to where Erika was. I called her as I waited to get into the Grand Ole Opry "Where are you?" "I'm in the seats, and you'll be surprised at how good they are." HA! She'd be surprised too!

The seats *were* very good - we were on the Mezzanine. Even though we weren't close, we had a very clear view of the stage. That was fantastic.

Erika looked at me and said "What? What happened? Did you meet him?!"

And that's when the sleep deprivation of the last week combined with shock and emotion all bubbled to the surface and spilled out everywhere like boiled over mac and cheese. I started to shake and cry like all those damn silly fans yelling for Elvis or the Beatles. (I know!) I told her about it, showed her the pictures, and eventually calmed down. I swear I sat there in a daze for the first half of the show until Trace appeared on stage.

I had done it! I had REALLY FULFILLED MY DESTINY!

It was crazy and lucky and just nuts! I couldn't believe it. It was awesome!

We watched the show, hootin' and hollerin' and clapping until our hands were nearly raw. We had a great time. The first half of the show was broadcast on the radio, the second half was live on the GAC channel. The televised version had more "Trace" in it because it was his fifth anniversary with the Grand Ole Opry. (I TiVo'd the show so I could watch it when I returned home)

After the show, we went out to celebrate with a shot of Jack Daniels. When in Rome you drink wine with the Romans. When in Tennesse, you drink Tennesee Whiskey. I'd never tried it before, and I figured "Why not?" We went back to John A's where they carded us. Apparently, my ID passed the test, but Erika's did not. She is over the legal age (not very far over, but over all the same), but after the bartender and restaurant manager both scrutinized her TWO forms of identification in the bright light of the kitchen, they came back and told us they would not serve her. HA! (See, Erika, gray hair comes in handy sometimes!)

No worries, we just went back to the hotel, and opted for a drink in the hotel bar. After all, Jack is Jack, right? Besides, this way, we wouldn't be driving anywhere. We walked into that Applebee's like we owned it (Yeah, I said Applebee's! What? You don't do shots of Jack at Applebee's? Come on! We're bad ass!), did our shot of Jack and walked back to the room. By the time we shut the door, we were already dissolving into giggles. We may or may not have drunk dialed. We did however, laugh our asses off for the next hour or so.

All too soon, it was Sunday and the day we were to return home from our adventure. It was good that we had only opted for one drink the night before because we had a long drive ahead of us. Any more than that and I would have been asleep at the wheel, I'm sure of it. I wasn't hurtin', but I was tired. Saturday had been a busy, busy day. Fulfilling your destiny is exhausting!

We got dressed, packed up, and checked out of our hotel. Shoney's was right next store, so we headed over to their breakfast buffet. Sylvia was our waitress and she was a hoot and a half! Smiling, laughing... just great. She brought us what she claimed was the best chocolate milk on the planet, and she wasn't lying! We left her a good tip, and offered to bring her with us. She declined. After breakfast, we stopped at the gas station, then pointed the Externally Flameless Mommyvan back home.

Our trip back to Illinois was non-eventful, and that's ok. We didn't have the urge to yell out to passing cars or toll booth personnel, but we had plenty of time to listen to the radio, reminisce about the previous day and make plans to go back to Nashville again someday.

They say what happens in Nashville gets written into a song. Well, if you hear a song about a couple of midwestern Thelma and Louise wannabees stalking Country Music singers, shootin' Jack, cussin' just because we can, laughing hysterically in their hotel room late into the evening, and hitting up Shoney's before burnin' rubber outta town Duke-style, I'm sure that's just a coincidence.

HOLLER!

- - - - - - - - -

Click here for all the pictures we took this weekend

Murphy's Law of Attraction

2008-08-21T08:53:00.010-05:00

I gotta tell ya... this has been one helluva week around the Circus.

The kids are going back to school next week, we're dealing with Buddy's encopresis (apparently we need to cut back a bit on the Miralax), I lost a good friend, Sweet Pea was up around 3am this morning being sick, I haven't been able to get to sleep any night this week, and when I do, I swear the night is over in a blink. Work has been nuts, the little clowns have been cranky... I just can't tell if it's Murphy's Law at work (whatever can go wrong will) or if it's the Law of Attraction (troubled thoughts become reality).

It's been one helluva week.

We kept all the kids home today, because I didn't want to risk taking Sweet Pea in the van in case she got sick again. I stayed home with the clowns this morning, and will be working this afternoon. The little clowns ganged up on me at one point. Both Sweet Pea and Buddy having "issues that needed Mommy's attention" simultaneously. Buddy isn't sick, just, um... poopy.

I called in to work a little bit ago, about 10 minutes later than when I told the boss I would call. I apologized and told him things were a little bit crazy around my house this morning.

I haven't eaten anything today yet. I'm tired and I'm crashing folks.

Did I mention I've been up since 3am this morning?

But hey! There is one big reason I'm still upright and semi-functioning rather than waving the white flag of surrender, crawling under the covers and hiding...

Friday morning, Erika and I are outta here like Thelma and Louise, but without the dramatic ending, and definitely WITH a whole lotta fun!!

Nashville won't know what hit 'em.

Aw, damn

2008-08-19T12:07:00.001-05:00

The world is a better place because he was here.

Whiplash

2008-08-19T08:08:00.003-05:00

It's one of those roller coaster weeks.

My dear friend Doug is at the Hospice hospital in Colorado. We are receiving updates from his lovely wife. The last couple of mornings, the family has been told to "Come right away...", and each day, Doug rallies and continues on. He is surrounded by his family, his favorite place to be.

AND

In three days Erika and I leave for Nashville, TN and the Grand Ole Opry! You have no idea how excited I am about this road trip adventure. Just Erika and I and three whole days of making our own schedule, eating what we want, when we want, and not having to be a role model to anyone! It's going to be SO MUCH FUN.

AND

There is work to do, long lists of work to do at work. There are lists of work to do at home. The temperature and humidity are creeping up again, and that's no fun for me. I get overheated easily and then itchy and then irritable and when you're making dinner and fielding requests and questions from three clowns all at the same time... well, let's just say that I sure showed a complete lack of style and decorum.

My mind is spinning at night with concern about Doug and his family as well as planning for our trip to Nashville. There are other projects in my head, too. Baby shower for Dit, back to school for clowns (still need gym shoes and a lunchbox for Punkin), computer things that need to get done for some sites I'm managing, and there is always house cleaning and laundry to keep up with...

I'm not sure which will get me first--the whiplash from the roller coaster, or my head exploding from the racing thoughts. Maybe it will be both.

Either way, it's Nashville or bust on Friday*!

* I had a pinched nerve or something for a bit on Sunday - the back of my neck and my right arm suddenly hurt and felt weak. Hubs said "Well, it's your right arm, so it's not a heart attack." I told him I couldn't have a heart attack, I was going to Nashville on Friday. Heh.

I can, I am

2008-08-15T07:18:00.003-05:00

I recently discovered I can turn a pair of boys pajama pants right-side-in when I'm barely out of a dead sleep, in the middle of the night, in the dark.

I can also go to bed at a reasonable hour, sleep like a log -- a big, fat, 100 year old log -- not waking up once in the night, and not hearing the alarm in the morning and still be bone tired when I wake up.

I can be running late for work, and still be graced with the opportunity to spend three or four minutes just sitting with one of the clowns, telling them what I love about them, listening to them, while music plays in the background - and not once think "Sheesh, I'd better get moving, ok hurry up, get dressed, let's go."

I can want to lose a few pounds, and get in better shape and still give in to the call of chocolate and ice cream without much of a fight.

I can also get into a zone where I am more focused on losing those few pounds, and stronger-willed against the chocolate and ice cream.

I can decide I need to get better with tracking my finances, then not balance my checkbook for weeks, sometimes months.

I am a walking contradiction, consistently inconsistent.

And for the moment, I'm totally ok with that.

Day 8: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

2008-08-11T19:26:00.003-05:00

The Last Day of our Trip!

States conquered this day: Missouri, Illinois

Well I'm flying across the land
Trying to get a hand
Playing in a travelling band

I was very grateful Hubs decided to call it a day as we made our way across Oklahoma. I had every faith that he could have gotten us home that evening, but at what cost? That would have been one very long (mofo'n) day of driving for him. He had already been dealing with body aches from all the driving and walking.

Our stopping point for the day would be Joplin, Missouri, just inside of the Missouri, Oklahoma border. The kids (and I) had had enough of being in the Circus Truckster for the day and we were all looking forward to getting out and unfolding our legs. We had told the little clowns that we would stop and buy them a souvenior to remember the trip by (yeah, I know... we couldn't find anything in the last 9 states we were in?!). We also had to stop at the nearest Wal-Mart/Target and buy some new underwear for the Circus -- If we were this close to getting home, there was no way I was going to attempt to do laundry at the hotel or a nearby laundromat after dark. (and Hey! It was MY vacation, too!) So, Hubs announced to the clowns that we were going to Wal-Mart after we checked into our hotel. "For what?", Sweet Pea asked. "Well, we have to buy some underwear." I answered back. Her incredulous reply was priceless "UNDERWEAR?! THAT'S what we're going to have to remember this trip by? New underwear?!" I laughed out loud and told her "Yes!" For some reason, she didn't believe me, and asked Hubs for confirmation.

We checked into our hotel, stopped by Steak and Shake for dinner, then spent some time in Wal-Mart being slap-happy. It was getting late, and we really needed to get to bed. It was obvious that we were all a little strung out, but for some reason, we still didn't get to bed until after midnight -- even the clowns. Our hotel for the night was a suite. All the clowns slept on the fold out couch, and only settled down for bed after I turned the Disney Channel off at midnight (after asking them at least twice to do it themselves.)

Dawn broke (as in came and went) with us still sawing logs. Eventually, the kids woke and let us know it was morning. We all got dressed, packed up, and did one last check to make sure we weren't leaving anything behind before we headed on down to the breakfast buffet. Mmmm. It was a GOOD buffet. Mama likey waffles. (That was one of the better hotels we stayed in during our great adventure)

We were on the road again around 10:00am, headed NorthEast, the direction of home. The day went pretty well, although it was not without it's glitches. The air conditioning in the Circus Truckster began acting up around Cuba, Missouri, and the clowns were getting a little squirrely. Thankfully, the DVD player pacified the clowns somewhat, and the air conditioning righted itself after a short rest.

Around 2:00pm, we crossed on over into Illinois (YAY!!), and stopped for lunch at Collinsville, IL--at a McDonald's, of course. (I would be very happy to never eat at another McDonald's ever again in my entire life... although, I would miss those hot fudge sundaes). The sign at the nearby Motel Six made me laugh.

As we got back in the Circus Truckster, there was a definite feeling off "ok, let's do this" for Hubs and I. This was going to be the last leg of our 2008 Great Circus Road Trip Adventure. We were on our way home.

We ambled North along I-55, then I-39/Route 51. It rained off and on a little bit. Then, we saw the storm approaching. I've never seen a storm take over the sky like that. It really was unbelieveable -- and that was before we drove into it. The rain came down in sheets, making driving more difficult. Our expected time of arrival at home creeped from 6:00pm to 6:30pm and beyond. We knew for sure that we weren't stopping anywhere overnight this time, but it didn't make the drive any easier.

The clowns began to pay less attention to the movie on the DVD player, and more to the oncoming storm. They were getting a bit nervous about it, so Hubby began to play "spot the lightning" with them. It worked! Their focus shifted from being nervous about the storm to 'playing with' it. My Hubby, he's a genius sometimes, ya know?

Hubs had a firm grip on the steering wheel and just kept us pointed towards home. The rain kept coming down, the winds blew, and soon, pea-sized hail began to fall. That is when Hubs pulled over at a gas station for a bit--but not long. Home was a'callin us! We were on our way again, every mile getting us closer to our own beds.

Our odometer changed over to 4000 miles when we were just a few blocks shy of home. The rain had finally passed, and as we pulled onto our street, I noticed the sky looked to be on fire. It was amazing.

Once in our own driveway, we all spilled out of the Circus Truckster, unfolding our legs for the last time, and began the process of emptying out the truck. The house was pretty stuffy after being closed up for a week, and I went to the patio to open it, and get a little cross-breeze action going. The sky out the back of the house wasn't nearly as orange, but you could see the faintest of rainbows. That was the best "welcome home" we could have received.

It had been a crazy, fantastic Great Circus Road Trip adventure for us. The likes of which we've never attempted to accomplish before. In spite of the work involved in the trip, and the moments when the clowns were doing their very best to be KIDS, we all had a great time. Certainly, it was a trip that we'll remember for a long, long time.

2 Parents
3 Clowns
1 Ford Expedition
8 days
10 States
4000 Miles

We are nucking futs, but, probably in a good way, yeah?

(You can see all of the 2008 Great Circus Road Trip pictures here)

If you missed any of our vacation recap, or just feel the need to read it all over again, here are the linkys you need:
Day 1
Day 2
Day 3
Day 4
Day 5
Days 6 & 7

Thanks for reading!

Peptalks

2008-08-07T08:00:00.004-05:00

There are so many things I want to do, and so many things I need to do...

Write more
Finish the 2008 Great Circus Road Trip saga
New blog design
Get prints made of the best clown photos from vacation, birthday party
Move my photos from my old photo site to Flickr
Read more of the too many books I have waiting for me to read them
Go to Nashville, TN with Erika (in two weeks!!)
Just 'chill' with the Hubby
Be more of an "in the moment" Mom
That work thing and all that encompasses
Back to school and all that entails for the clowns
Plan, hostess my sister's baby shower
Check in on some of my offline friends, family
Redesign my old site
Move the blog over to the old site somehow

In the next eight weeks, I'm going to do a lot of what I need to do, and as much of what I want to do as I can.

I've been feeling better, and (as always) trying to maintain a balance of what the family needs and what I need. I've been trying to be happier with who I am NOW. What can I say? I'm a work in progress.

Claudia had this great post where she listed all the stuff she loved about herself, and challenged others to do the same about themselves. I haven't done it, but I have been thinking about it. I find myself losing focus and seeing more of what I don't like about me. I need to change that.

David wants to change the world. I love that idea. Let's give it a shot, shall we?

If there's one thing I've learned, it's that you will get further if you try and fail, than if you hadn't tried at all.

Days 6 and 7: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

2008-08-04T20:15:00.000-05:00

Day Six

States visited this day: Arizona, New Mexico

Our vacation was winding down as we headed the Circus Truckster back in the direction of home, via Route 40 / old Route 66.

We woke up this morning to find Buddy had a rash covering his torso. Apparently, he did not like the lotion I put on him the other night.

Breakfast was at McDonald's today. As we pulled up to it, Buddy exclaimed "Hey there McDonald's! How you doin' buddy?!"

Our first stop of the day Was the Meteor Crater. That was pretty cool. The kids were properly impressed with the very large, very old dent in the ground. The signage around the crater stated that 20 football games could be held at the same time in the floor of the crater with no overlap. Two million spectators could sit watching those games along the sloping sides of the crater. Now that's a pretty big hole in the ground.

From the Meteor Crater, we made our way to Winslow, AZ. The Circus Truckster let us know that OUTSIDE the temperature was at 100 degrees. That's pretty hot. (but it's a dry heat, heh) We ambled around the town for a bit, taking pictures of the Winslow Station, some of the historic signage, and, of course, "standing on the corner." It was kinda neat. Our last stop before heading out of town was at the Dairy Queen.

As we drove on to Holbrook, AZ, I couldn't help but notice that the clouds just didn't look real. Surely, clouds that perfect were painted in the sky. Or maybe it was just because we were missing the mountains we had been seeing for days. In Holbrook, AZ, we passed the Wig Wam Motel. The kids thought that was pretty cool, and commented on the similarity to the "traffic cone motel" in the movie "Cars". There were older cars parked outside of some of the Wig Wams.

We had hoped to make it to Albequerque, New Mexico that day, but we only made it to Santa Rosa. For some reason, I had the hardest time remembering where we were. I must have asked Hubby a few times "where are we?" The hotel was nice, and it must have been around midnight before we were all asleep. Hubby had hoped to get an early start the following morning, but that didn't happen.

Day Seven

States visited this day: New Mexico, Texas, Oklahoma, Kansas, Missouri

After breakfast at the hotel in (where were we?) Santa Rosa, New Mexico, we piled into the Circus Truckster with the intention of making it all the way to Northern, IL by bedtime. Hubby had set the GPS and it had given us an ETA back home of around 2:00am (the following morning). I personally thought Hubby was being a wee overconfident in his abilities when he announced "Oh, I can do that. No problem." Uh-huh. we'll see.

After a stop for gas, we were on our way, the rain following us. Buddy's rash had been getting increasingly worse, and we stopped in Tucumcari, New Mexico for some allergy medicine to help him out until we could get him back home and to the doctor. Hubby thought he had heard that one of the players for the Bears, Brian Urlacher, had some connection with Tucumcari. As it turns out, he was right.

We stopped at a small pharmacy that was definitely not the chain pharmacies that I'm used to. This one was definitely a throwback to the type of "old fashioned" pharmacy of the past. Almost to the point of being spooky. We didn't stay long in Tucumcari, New Mexico.

The rain stayed with us through the Texas pan-handle. It was the smallest part of Texas, but it boasted the Largest Cross in the Western Hemisphere, as well as the Cadillac Ranch. (By the way, if you have a very, very, very strong need to pee, do it before you get to the Cadillac Ranch. If you don't stop before you reach the Cadillac Ranch, do NOT get out and walk to the line of cars. It is much easier to hold yer water if yer not walking. Another good reason to go before you get there, there is no way to hide behind any of those buried cars, or any ANYTHING to relieve yourself. You will end up giving the camera to your spouse, doing the "Oh My God I Have To Pee RIGHT NOW" walk back to the truck while your family (and others) giggle behind your back and if he doesn't use the remote to unlock the doors you are going to kill him, then you will beg and plead for your spouse to drive as effin' fast as possible who cares if that's a cop there just FLOOR IT, MAN! to the nearest Love's Gas Station a very, very, very long mile down the road where you will barely wait until the truck is in park before you throw open the door and make haste to the who cares what it looks like just please dear Lord let it have a toilet and a door (although at this point a door isn't a necessity and in another few minutes a toilet won't be a necessity either) restroom where 10 seconds later you can finally breathe a HUGE sigh of relief. Don't ask me how I know this. I will not tell you, but Hubby may be more than willing to relay to you the whole humourous event in great detail. No, I will not give you his email address.)

After the excitement of Brian Urlacher's car dealership in Tucumcari, New Mexico, you can guess how excited we were to pass Yukon, OK, Home of Garth Brooks. (Heh) We waved to the home of Garth Brooks and continued on. Oklahoma is a long state to drive through. Somewhere along all the cows and horses and corn, Buddy got very upset with Hubby and I. I'm not sure why, but I'll tell you, that boy's four-year-old tirade lasted a good 10 minutes or more before I finally put a stop to it. He told us repeatedly that he did not like "lelling at us (yelling), but clearly we were not listening. I recorded a small portion of it via my cell phone for posterity. It's a bit difficult to make out, but it's priceless.

Our course took us through Kansas. I had hoped to see the Largest Ball of Twine, but that was a couple of hundred miles out of our way, and, by this point, Hubby was very much into "get 'em home" mode.

As the day and the drive wore on, the GPS's estimated time of our arrival home shifted. First, 2:15am, then 3:15am. Hubby was still intent on us getting home that "evening", I was still doubtful. One last check of the GPS showed our arrival around 6:00am. That was the point where Hubs waved the proverbial white flag for the day.

(one more installment will finish up the 2008 Great circus Road Trip Adventure)

(You can see all of the pictures here)

Order Confirmation

2008-08-03T11:03:00.004-05:00

-----Original Message-----

From: myerika@bff.com [mailto:myerika@bff.com]
Sent: Thursday, July 31, 2008 3:16 PM
To: CircusKelli
Subject: Order Confirmation

7/31/2008 3:16:03 PM

Qty.	Product	BFF Part #	Price
Dear Circus Kelli: Thank you for choosing BFF. We have received your online order. Please take a moment to review it for accuracy and completeness. Order Number: TA77218 PO Number: TA108231 Customer Number: 1121001 Purchaser: M. Erika Deliver To: Circus Kelli, Birthday Present

1	Mr. Trace Adkins	TA853561	(priceless)
Details: Augst 23 Road Trip to Grand Ole Opry, Nashville, TN October 10 Sears Centre, Hoffman Estates, IL Special Instructions: Have a good time, laugh, take tons of pictures, blog about it later. Enjoy!

More to come!

Pausing for station identification

2008-07-27T22:02:00.002-05:00

It's time now to take a break from our riveting tales from the 2008 Great Circus Road Trip Adventure to acknowledge last week, and look forward to this week...

Dude. It's been biz-zay.

Sweet Pea's sixth birthday party was on Saturday. Family, food, friends, presents, cake, ice cream, and leftovers. Pictures will be forthcoming.

Sunday, we had a "water day" for the clowns in our backyard. We inflated two kiddie swimming pools and the slip and slide. There was much clown frolicing, popsicles and juice and snacks. I supervised from the sidelines in my folding lounge chair until it was time to pack up, clean up, get dressed and take the birthday weekend girl and siblings off to Rainforest Cafe for dinner.

Monday will bring the whole "where did the weekend go, I can't believe it's Monday again" feeling, and will start another round of big all day meetings happening this week. It would seem that while I was touring North America, my boss was thinking of all the ways he missed me. I've been a whole lot busier since I returned from vacation, and while busy is good, it tends to take all my focus.

This week, the days will be filled with meeting scheduling, meeting planning, meeting note-taking, and meeting hosting, as well as a trip to the dentist to tend to some cavities. Thankfully, the end of the week will mean a get-together with a couple of friends at our house. (Which means *someone* is really going to have to clean this place up before Friday night... sheesh!)

I will get the rest of the vacation story posted, and birthday party pictures uploaded at some point. The only reason this is getting posted now is because I'm procrastinating on getting my carcass to bed. I have NO idea what I'm wearing to work tomorrow, and if I try to make a decision now, I'll have to give up on the hope that tomorrow really isn't Monday, and I won't be able to sleep all day.

Day Five: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

2008-07-21T21:51:00.008-05:00

Monumental Circus Adventures

States visited this day: Colorado, Arizona, Utah, New Mexico

Circus Truckster Conversation: "This is the best trip ever!"

We awoke this morning and set out from Cortez, CO for the Four Corners Monument and Navajo Tribal Park. For a small fee, you are allowed to enter a small, circular open air market, with a low, flat marble monument. There is an 'X' etched in the marble with the names of a state in each one of the sections; Colorado, Arizona, New Mexico, Utah. It's the only place where you can stand in four states at one time.

(click for a larger version)

The monument was not very busy, but we still dutifully waited for the "X" to clear of people so we could have our family picture taken in all four states at once. A kindly gentleman, formerly of Illinois himself, took our family photo for us. Hubby offered to do the honors for his family as well.

We walked around for a little bit, then climbed back into the Circus Truckster and made tracks further into Arizona. Our destination: The Grand Canyon.

Or so we thought.

At the intersection of 160 and 163, Hubby decided to take a right, and we were off to visit Monument Valley Navajo Tribal Park near the borders of Arizona and Utah. It was a v-e-r-y l-o-n-g drive, and I had plenty of opportunity to take pictures of the scenery. As we neared Monument Valley, the landscape became more interesting.

Hubby pulled off the road to take a picture of a far off Monument Valley. A friendly little dog trotted up to Hubby right away. Hubby is the kind that would take in every stray that crossed his path. (Which may or may not explain why he married me) He told the dog to sit and it listened. He held out his hand and asked the dog and the dog put his paw into Hubby's hand. Clearly, this little guy was someone's pet. The clowns still in the Circus Truckster, watching intently and making plans. "Mom! Maybe he'll come with us!" I suddenly had visions of Aunt Edna's dog from National Lampoon's Vacation. "Uh, no."

Once we reached Monument Valley, the first thing we did was visit the visitor's center. Not so much to buy a trinket or get more information. We'd all been holding our water for three states, and it was time answer nature's call before hitting the bumpy trail.

Back into the Circus Truckster, we followed the 17-mile unpaved loop around the park, between and around all the natural red rock formations. I was in awe of it, and clearly I was not the only one. Just a few minutes into "trail ride", Buddy pipes up with "Thank you God for all the rocks."

At times, Hubby pretended the truck was struggling on the hilly terrain and getting stuck in the soft sand. I was overwhelmed with the desire to climb on the rocks and let the sand slip between my fingers. (I always did love sandboxes when I was a kid)

When the trail ended, we were near the visitor's center again. There were a few mud huts that the kids played in for a bit, and I got my chance to see what all that soft-looking red orange sand felt like. (It was HOT to the touch!)

Now that the clowns had been exercised a bit, we piled back into the Circus Truckster, gave the kids water, and were off on our way to the Grand Canyon. For reals.

Grand Canyon Web Cam

It was a long drive from the Utah/Arizona border to Grand Canyon National Park. Along the way, Buddy proclaimed all Taco Bells were "Ding Bells!" That's going to stick around for a while, I can tell you that! Once near the Grand Canyon, we tuned the radio to the "park station" and were welcomed by a voice that sounded (to me, at least) like Bucky's! She got a little repetitive after a while, though, so we turned down the sound and made our way from the East Entrance along Desert View Drive to the South Rim, stopping at the Watch Tower along the way. After the Tower and surrounding area was sufficiently explored, we continued towards Grand Canyon Village. We got out and explored a bit around there, giving the clowns more time to stretch their legs.

Hubby assisted the clowns in getting to a few precarious spots here and there, and I took pictures. There were a couple of times near the Watch Tower that my inner Mommyvoice was damn near freaking out about how close the clowns were to the edge WITH NO GUARDRAILS, but I did my very best to remain calm, take the picture quickly and order Hubby to get my children away from the edge of the cliff without sounding too hysterical.

(Click each of the pictures for a larger version)

Do you SEE HOW CLOSE THEIR LITTLE FEET ARE TO THE EDGE?!
*shudder*

There were a lot of people and cars vying for space near the Grand Canyon Village, and we opted to pile back into the Circus Truckster, make our way South and find a nice little spot in which to call it a day. Hubby had done a LOT of driving. As it turned out, there was a lot more to do that day.

We aimed the Circus Truckster for Williams, AZ. Unfortunately, the one hotel that had a vacancy had cardboard boxes for mattresses. We had already spent one nearly sleepless night during our vacation because of a bad mattress, we weren't going to repeat that mistake. We headed West for a bit over to Ash Fork, but didn't find any place we would be willing to close our eyes at. With an eye on the gas gauge, Hubby double-backed and found a lovely, reasonably-priced hotel near Flagstaff.

By the time we reserved a room, we were all tired, hungry, and more than a little slap-happy. At some point, Hubby confiscated Sweet Pea's "Summer Leopard" and secured him in the sunroof of the Circus Truckster. You would laugh at the double-takes when there is a summer leopard's tail sticking out the roof of your vehicle.

Dinner was the last thing on our agenda before we could finally call it a day. We ended up at the Village Inn near Flagstaff, AZ. Thankfully for the few other patrons that were there, the Circus was seated in the corner. I guess our reputation had preceded us. We were more than a little silly during our meal -- parents included! After the long day and all the miles we'd traveled, "Clucker Dunkers" (an item on the menu resembling chicken nuggets) was VERY funny. Unfortunately for Punkin, she wasn't too thrilled when that suddenly became her new nickname.

We eventually finished our meal and ~~they kicked us out~~ left to make our way back to our home for the night.

The following day, we would take the kids down the road they knew from the Disney Pixar movie "Cars"; Route 66.

(You can see all of the pictures here)

for those of you who are finding these virtual vacation posts dull as dishwater, don't worry, we only have another two or three days left

Day Four: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

2008-07-20T13:25:00.002-05:00

States visited this day: Colorado

I started off this day by trying to kill Hubby's GPS unit. Punkin and I were loading the truck as Hubby and the kids checked out of the hotel. I didn't realize Punkin had set the GPS unit down on the back of the truck, and I shut the rear door right on it. I picked it up off the ground where it had somehow landed, Punkin and I looked at each other like "Whoa. That's not good."

Thankfully, the GPS unit was dented, but still functional. I hadn't slept well the night before and spent most of the morning in a state of "I can't do anything right." but eventually recovered. Hubby ordered a new 'cover' for the GPS unit which arrived home before we did.

After that mishap and ensuing drama, we were off to the Royal Gorge in Canon City, CO.

Just completely, unbelieveable, the Royal Gorge boasts the "world's highest suspension bridge", spanning the Arkansas River 1,053 feet below. That's a l-o-n-g way down, lemme tell ya.

The Circus walked across the bridge (to get to the other side), stopping along the way to take a look at how far up we were... and to let cars pass. When you stood still, you could feel the bridge moving a bit with the traffic and wind.

On the other side, we visited with bison, elks, deer, goats and burros. The two littles each rode a burro, but Buddy only did it after Sweet Pea did it first.

There was also a little "Wild West Town" complete with jail and general store. The kids hammed it up "in jail", sat together in the really big rocking chair outside the general store, and talked to the "horse lady" about palaminos (Sweet Pea had a huge fascination with palaminoes during the trip). As we were walking through "town," Sweet Pea spotted two Texas Longhorn Steers and a cowboy tending to them. After asking us if it was ok to talk to the cowboy, Sweet Pea (all 3.5 feet of her) walked up to the six foot tall cowboy and even bigger Texas Longhorn Steer and struck up a conversation. Before we knew it, she was petting the creature. This was Punkin and Buddy's cue to also come and pet the animal.

A little bit later, we walked back across the bridge so we could take the carriage ride trolley thingy down to the bottom of the gorge. That was cool. Once at the bottom, Hubby and the clowns took turns throwing rocks into the Arkansas River. When the clowns tired of that, we went back to the top, then over to the aerial tramway to go across the gorge. THAT was a trip! You're just suspended out there in the middle of nothing, over the gorge. Buddy loved it, Sweet Pea, not so much.

The heat and the elevation were starting to get to the clowns (and me), so we eventually walked back across the bridge (again) and piled back in the Circus Truckster. Hubby drove South through Colorado, and we spent the night in Cortez, CO. I passed the time by taking random pictures, texting my SIL, and reading the occasional roadsign. One of the funnier ones I saw advertised one of the go-kart/fun places. It said "Scream until Daddy stops!" For some reason, Hubby didn't want me to point that one out to the kids.

still more to come...

(You can see all of the pictures here)

Day Three: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

2008-07-17T20:45:00.002-05:00

Pikes Peak or Bust!

States visited this day: Colorado

Circus Truckster Conversation:
Sweet Pea singing: "I saw Mommy kissing Santa's missing toe..."
(where does she come up with this stuff?)

We started off the day with yet another lovely continental breakfast eaten in our hotel room so the children could feel like they were at home watching cartoons on the television and dropping crumbs onto the floor. This also gave me more time to hunt around the room for every belonging we brought with us, just to be sure we didn't leave a favorite toy or pair of stanky underwear behind when we moved on.

As the children were ushered into the Circus Truckster and the parents fussed with packing the suitcases and other items into the truck for the day, I noticed Buddy's door was still open. He was all the way in the vehicle, setting up his "car seat space" for the day, so I shut the door. ON HIS HAND. Yikes! Thankfully, we had not checked out of the hotel room yet, so Hubby scooped up his injured son and rushed him back into the hotel to tend to him. I sat quietly in the Circus Truckster (with the two girls) feeling like crap and duly chastising myself. From that moment on, I made damn sure all hands and feets were way inside the vehicle any time I shut a door after that.

Hubby and Buddy returned a short while later, with Buddy holding his finger in a cup of ice. After a quick stop at Wal-Mart for water and a bunch of other unnecessary items, we were on our way to visit the Harley Dealer we found the day before, then on to Pikes Peak, Colorado. Years (and years and YEARS) ago, Hubby and his family had gone on a road trip to Colorado, but did not make it up to the Summit of Pikes Peak. A rock had gotten into the tire or brakes of his Dad's car and they turned around and came back down the mountain. This time, we were on a mission. Pikes Peak or Bust!

We began our twisty, turny ascent to the summit. The sign at the entrance said it would take an hour to get up to the summit, and an hour to get back down. It didn't seem like it took that long, but it must have.

One of the first things we saw on our ascent was a "Bigfoot Crossing" sign. That just cracked us up -- mostly because we're easily amused. Of course, after that, the clowns were slightly freaked about running into Bigfoot, but only until we told them Bigfoot wasn't real, and what they really should be worried about were the bears and mountain lions. (hee!)

The road to the summit was just a two lane road with no guardrails. At some points, the road wasn't even paved. Hubby took a little delight in freaking out the kids by "getting close" to the side of the road. Sweet Pea took to hiding her face in her pillow when Hubby did that. He wasn't that close, but it sure did look that way. At one point, it did look like we were about to drive off into nothing.

Hubby took this teaching opportunity to tell the clowns about the "Alpine Zone" and the "Tree Line" and what those terms meant, using the natural visiual aids just out the Circus Truckster window.

Up and up we went, our ears popping every so often. During the great road trip, I discovered that my hearing suddenly felt like I was talking in an airplane around 10,000 feet. That meant that for most of our time in Colorado, I couldn't hear very well, and more than once blowing my nose ended with an "OW!" when my ears popped -- once with a rather loud squeak that startled me. Having some allergy difficulty during our road trip didn't help the situation, I can tell you that.

As we made our way up the mountain, the lush trees gave way to scrub, snow, and eventually rocks. The Circus Truckster groaned a little bit, but eventually got us up to Pikes Peak Summit at 14,110 feet, and not a moment too soon. Most of the Circus had to use the restroom (along with nearly everyone else who had traveled to the Summit), inconveniently located at the very back of the Summit House Gift Shop/Restaurant.

After we finished answering nature's call, we made our way back outside to gaze at the view. And what a view it was! The treeless, rocky terrain made me think of the surface of the moon. Sounds, voices all seemed a little hushed or muffled at that high altitude. (Or maybe it was just my ears!)

We let the kids roam (carefully!) among the rocks, and took pictures by a couple of strategically placed "photo opp shots". I had sat Buddy on the "stop" for the Pikes Peak Cog Railway and told him to smile. I took three steps back while Buddy hung on and grinned. Except for that little platform he is sitting on, it looked like he was suspended in mid-air, the far off mountains serving as a backdrop.

I turned to find Hubby talking on his cell phone and wondered who he could be calling. It was his Dad. Hubby called his Dad from the top of Pikes Peak to tell him we had made it to the summit, and also to thank him for bringing the family to Colorado all those years ago.

We milled around a bit more on the summit, then wandered over to the "America The Beautiful" plaque before piling back into the Circus Truckster to being our descent. Again with the twisty turns and the popping ears. A quick brake check around the halfway point and eventually we were off the mountain and on our way to Canon City, Colorado.

We had made it to the Pikes Peak Summit today! Tomorrow, the Royal Gorge!

(You can see all of the pictures here)

Day Two: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

2008-07-16T13:21:00.002-05:00

A Mile High

States visited this day: Colorado

Circus Truckster Conversation:
Sweet Pea: "Speckled warblers are kinda shy, but I think chocolate crumbs help them come out."

24 hours into the trip, we realized we forgot:
Actual gym shoes for Punkin. Croc look-a-likes (Croc-a-likes) are not great for climbing slippery rocks.

We were up and out early this morning, anxious to get our first good look at real live MOUNTAINS. We headed up the Big Thompson Canyon, into Estes Park and over Trail Ridge Road into Rocky Mountain National Park, stopping along the way to explore by a pull off alongside the road. They all (including Hubby) threw stones into the river, and pushed their own boundaries by climbing on the rocks. Hubby assisted their journeys on the rocks to be sure they were safe.

After a while, we piled back in the Circus Truckster and continued on up Trail Ridge Road. We made it up to the highest point on the road and set off on a few short hikes here and there. There was a lot of getting in the truck, getting out of the truck, and we were all in good spirits. The elevation did start to pose a problem for me, but everyone else was doing well.

At some point, we loaded back into the Circus Truckster and made our way back down the mountain. The little clowns had fallen asleep, and I may have dozed for a bit as well. As we were coming down the mountain, Buddy's stomach suddenly decided it didn't agree with the elevation and up came breakfast.

We cleaned him up the best we could (all our clothes were at our hotel for the night already), and stopped at the next Target we could find. I purchased a new shirt, shorts and underwear for him. Once cleaned up and changed, Hubby drove around for a bit, "accidentally" finding the Harley Davidson dealer in Loveland, CO. The building was impressive, but unfortunately, they were closed.

It had been a busy day, and we decided to head on out to dinner, then try to calm the kids down and get them in bed. It must have worked because when Hubby tried to wake us around 10:00pm to watch the fireworks out our hotel window, not a one of the kids would budge out of bed. I'll confess that I merely stumbled to the window to look for a moment, before crawling back into bed myself. I can't be sure, but I think he declared us all "party poopers."

We were just all resting up for the next day's activities.

(You can see all of the pictures here)

Great Circus Road Trip 2008: Day One

2008-07-14T19:05:00.003-05:00

Westward!

States visited this day: Illinois, Iowa, Nebraska, Colorado

2:00am
In an effort to get ahead of traffic, The Three Ring Circus pulled up stakes and left town just after 2am. We weren't on the road an hour when one of the clowns asked (seriously) "Are we there yet?" After that, I made a point to ask "Are we there yet?" at least once a day.

4:30am

We crossed over into Iowa. "Bob and Tom" were on the radio at one point with the "Interstate 80 Song" - one of the funniest things I've heard, mostly because it's SO true! We spent a good portion of our time pointing out cows and horses to the kids. Mostly because they were asleep again.

9:25am
We're in Nebraska! Home of Arbor Day! Woo!

11:00am
Buddy's nose suddenly springs a leak, freaking the heck outta Sweet Pea who was sitting next to him. "MOM! BUDDY'S NOSE IS BLEEDING!! IT'S BLEEDING!!" Um, yeah, I'm about two feet in front of you, please stop yelling. I promise you I can hear you quite clearly. A few kleenex's later, Buddy and his nose were just fine.

Most exciting road side attraction(s) so far:
World's Largest Truck Stop in Iowa and the
Great Platte River Road Archway

We arrived in Denver, Colorado around 3:30pm, found our hotel room and rested up for a bit before meeting up with Denver Doug.

I "met" Doug online about eight years ago, we we've been friends since. Over time, I've come to think of him as a cyber-brother (Brudder Doug), and he's enjoyed reading the stories and seeing the pictures of the clowns growing up a little at a time. We were excited to be able to meet with him (finally!) face to face! Not only did we meet him, we were also blessed with meeting his lovely wife, Heather, and their daughter, Shelley. They're such lovely people. Really. They had a couple of toys for the kids, and a lot of ideas on things for us to do in the area.

We were lucky enough to squire Doug off to LoneStar Steakhouse for dinner where we talked his ears off (not really) and let the kids' energy wear him out completely. Doug is such lovely people, and he was so kind to Hubby and I and the little clowns. Our visit was too short, but the time was getting late, so we all piled back into the Circus Truckster and brought our guest of honor back home.

Lots of pictures had been taken, and hugs and goodbyes were exchanged when it was time. It was wonderful to meet Doug and his family. They're a nice bunch of folks.

It was already getting dark by the time we were on our way back to the hotel. We didn't get much of a look at the mountains that first day, but the sunset was beautiful.

(You can see all of the day's pictures here)

And now back to...

2008-07-13T22:01:00.003-05:00

Since we got home, I've unpacked all the suitcases, washed and put away four loads of laundry, washed three more loads of laundry just for grins, did some straightening around the house (like shoveling while it's still snowing), gone to the grocery store, and cooked three actual not-too-shabby-honest-to-goodness dinners for the Circus. I've also wiped my son's butt far too many times after poopy accidents this weekend. The boy who did not poop once the entire time we were on vacation (a full week), has moved his bowels once every two or three hours since we got home. That wouldn't be so bad if he would actually poop on the toilet, but he doesn't. Yet. Someday he will. I hope.

I'm sorry, what was I saying?

Oh, and I've sorted through the first two days worth of pictures taken during our vacation. I'm still in awe at the scenery. (Some photos of our time in Colorado have been posted to Flickr)

I've also spent some time over the last couple of days napping and fighting off migraines. I'm grateful that the headaches happened AFTER we returned (same with the pooping boy) so that I could be miserable in my own home.

Monday, however will be quite the change in what has become my routine. No more sleeping past 9am and napping in the afternoon for me. A fact that I find very sad indeed. But, alas, one must earn a living now and then to pay for such lovely vacations. Or so I've been told.

Paid Time Off, how I will miss thee.

And now back to our regularly scheduled life, already in progress...

Home Sweet Home

2008-07-11T12:59:00.003-05:00

My Grandmother used to say vacations are nice, but there's nothing like that feeling of coming home.

The Great Circus Road Trip Adventure has ended, and the Circus is now back at home base. The mountains were awe-inspiring and beautiful and breath-taking. It was a shame to have to leave them there.

All the detailed drama and pictures (over 700 of them taken!) will be coming soon.

Post vacation let down will commence this afternoon/evening when I attempt to tackle the one mountain we brought home with us -- the laundry.

Happy July Fourth!

2008-07-04T20:47:00.003-05:00

Flags, fireworks, BBQs and time with family.

We've spent some time touring this U.S. of A.

Purple mountains majesty?

Amber waves of grain?

We've seen 'em.

Plants and birds and rocks and things.

Cows, horses, cornfields.

Seen those, too.

I've taken 164 pictures so far. Most of those of the Big Thompson River and the incredible rock 'walls' of Rocky Mountain National Park. The weather has been fabulous, and we've been completely in awe of the mountains and clouds and rivers and rocks and wonders of the nature we've seen here.

It's been wonderful.

I'll post pictures when I can.

Happy Fourth of July everyone.

Circus Giraffes

2008-07-01T08:02:00.001-05:00

Nothing but troublemakers.

No more letting the animals watch Madagascar, that's for sure.

- - - - - - -

I'm in the midst of packing the five of us for a great, big Circus Road Trip adventure.

I am pretty much freaking/spazzing out about all the details and lists and my God I can't forget to pack the toothpastewipessunscreenatlasswimsuitsshortscocacola shirtsjeanssweaterunderwearsockscellphonejacketsearplugscamera. And that's just the stuff for home.

I'm also setting stuff up at work so that my boss doesn't feel like I've abandoned him in the wilderness somewhere, while making sure my administrative assistant counterparts don't feel like I've dumped a whole heap of garbage on them at the same time. After all, they'll have plenty of time to think of payback while I'm out, and they're a crafty bunch, those assistants.

Getting ready for the big adventure is an adventure in itself.

The giraffes, however, are not coming with us.

Rest assured, I'll be back.

Mommyland and Book Memes

2008-06-26T07:14:00.003-05:00

Laura tagged me with a book meme.

I don't do a lot of memes, but I'll do this one.

Here's the rules:

1. Pick up the nearest book.
2. Open to page 123
3. Find the fifth sentence.
4. Post the next three sentences.
5. Tag five people, and acknowledge who tagged you.

Technically, I'm in the middle of three different books. So...

Page 123, Sentence 6 and the next two sentences of Faber and Mazlish's "How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk":

5. Follow through.
The danger here is getting so carried away with your good feelings at having come up with a workable solution that you don't bother to make a specific plan to follow through. It's important to add, "What steps do we have to take to get this plan into motion?"

Page 123, Sentence 6 and the next two sentences of Trace Adkins' "A Personal Stand":

Things were looking up and I felt a little better.

Through all the dark clouds and stormy times, I never let the quality of my work suffer. I almost always went into the studio sober, because when I didn't the recording was unusable.

Page 123, Sentence 6 and the next two sentences of Mary Higgins Clark's "The Second Time Around":

But there are lots of ways to say "I love you too,", and Lynn's voice sounded warm in a sexy way. I was shocked at the next possibility that ran through my mind: Had Mrs. Nicholas Spencer been having a cozy chat with her missing husband?

And this is where I break rule number 5. I don't usually tag people, so if you want to do this meme, consider yourself tagged. If not, no pressure.

I could do this meme today because, I'm in "Mommyland" today. I took a day off of work, kept the kids home from "summer school" and scheduled a few doctor and dentist appointments for the kids. Woo! What fun! Three clowns, three appointments, spread throughout the day... I'm going to pack snacks and 'distractions' for the kids and try to summon up loads of patience (and "patients") in the Externally Flameless Mommyvan. Wish me luck!

*** Updated: Yesterday was everything I thought it would be and more. (Heh)

The first appointment went ok, after that, all bets were off. The two little clowns were acting like monkeys, and I was pretty much "toast" by dinnertime. I was SO happy when SIL came for a visit. I pretty much handed the kids over to her, sat down with a ~~bottle~~ glass of wine, and read my book.

One Lazy Sunday

2008-06-24T07:36:00.001-05:00

Ah... last weekend, the weather was lovely. Truly just practically perfect in every way.

I took the opportunity to set up the lawn chair, grab a book, and go read out on the deck that Hubby built.

While sitting in my lawn chair, I snapped a few photos of the clouds blowing by.

Sweet Pea even sweet-talked me into letting her have the digital camera so she could take some pictures of what she sees in our backyard.

Buddy Sings

2008-06-20T17:32:00.002-05:00

Buddy must finally be well rested and feeling better after dealing with strep two weeks ago. It took him a while to fully recover and get back to his normal self. Either that, or he's pleased to be back in the 'old' class at daycare, rather than Pre-K, even it if was just for one day.

Buddy's going around the house smiling and being happy and singing.

Little Bunny Foo Foo,
Hopping through the forest
Scooping up the field mice
And boppin' 'em on the head

Down came the good fairy and she said

"Little Bunny Foo Foo,
I don't want to see you
Scooping up the field mice
And boppin' 'em on the head.
I'll give you three chances,
And if you don't behave
I'll turn you into a goon!"

Turn you into a goon?! Yikes! I think it's too late for all of us! And I wasn't even anywhere near the field mice!

If I don't Toot it, who will?

2008-06-19T11:10:00.001-05:00

Ok, so... last year, I sat for and passed the CPS Exam.

Last month, I sat for the CAP Exam.

** insert long-dramatic-annoying-45-day-wait-pause here **

I PASSED!
I PASSED!
I PASSED!
I PASSED!
NEENER NEENER!
NANNY NANNY BOO BOO!

* insert happy dance here *

YAY!!!

Woo! That's a relief!

You may address me as CircusKelli CPS/CAP from this point forward. Thankyouverymuch.

It's my horn, and I shall *TOOT* it if I want to.

Now, if you'll excuse me. I have to add " / CAP " to all my business cards...

Information on the advantage of being certified

Information on the IAAP (International Association of Administrative Professionals)

Fathers

2008-06-16T12:22:00.001-05:00

A while back, I wrote this about my Dad.

That was written eight years ago now, and a lot has happened in that time. Life has gone on: Punkin has a brother and a sister, my sister, Dit, is expecting her first child, and G.G. passed on just over three years ago now.

While dealing with G.G.'s estate, I was the one designated to communicate with Dad. It was an odd time. It had been about 10 years since I showed up on his doorstep unexpectedly, and I had had time to work through what I felt for him and what I wanted, if anything, from him in a relationship. I'd given up on the Father/Daughter thing. He didn't seem to be wired for that.

Dad had sort of offered up the proverbial olive branch of peace to me just after G.G. had died. "Maybe it takes something like this to bring people closer..." I smiled in appreciation of the gesture. There was a time when I would have leapt at that offering. I knew him better now. I thanked him for the offer, and let him know that that probably wouldn't happen. He smiled and made a sort of concilliatory gesture that showed he understood what I was saying. If that kind of change did happen, then fine, but I wasn't going to "force" anything on him.

During that time, Dad had given me his cell number and told me to call him whenever I wanted. That is all I needed. Just the option to call him and talk to him if I wanted to. We will probably not ever be very close, and I have made peace with that.

The clowns sometimes ask me about my Father, (Where is he? Do I have one?) and I'm able to answer them calmly, honestly, without bitterness, and without bursting into inner-little-girl-child tears over what was lost and what I never had.

Father's Day was pretty much a non-issue for us growing up because of Dad's decision. Yesterday though, we celebrated Father's Day for Papa and for Hubby.

Papa is 93 years old. His health has been declining, and his hearing is mostly, if not entirely gone. Some days he's lucid, other days, not so much. It's dementia. The man that would get up early to take me fishing and go ice skating and accompany me on walks down the gravel road in Michigan isn't the same person he used to be. When his wife, Nonnie, passed away in 2006 he said he would "stick around" until he turned 95 years old. There is speculation in the family now that he may not last through this year.

I sat next to Papa yesterday, looked into his eyes, and held his hand. I wanted to just lean on him, let him know I loved him, but that seemed to make him slightly uncomfortable. I just sat next to him for a bit, fighting back tears. Eighteen or so years ago, I sat next to him at a Father's Day get-together and asked him to walk me down the aisle on my wedding day (that's how we announced our engagement to my family). This Father's Day, he sat there silent as the family moved around him, almost like he wasn't there. I do not know how much he understood or took in, nor what he was thinking.

And Hubby, bless his heart, came with me yesterday (I gave him the option of having a "day off" for Father's Day). In spite of the things that he may or may not do that drive me crazy, he is still the best Father I've ever known. He goes out in the backyard and plays with the clowns, keeps them in line, and does his very best to be there and take care of his family. He goes off on motorcycle rides, but even then, he is very present back at home. He balances me, and "talks me off the ledge" when I need it. Most of all, he loves his children, and is there for them, and me, on a daily basis.

The clowns may never know Papa the way I know him, but I am so very happy they have a Daddy that cares so much for them. That means a lot to me.

And... we're back!

2008-06-10T12:30:00.003-05:00

After several days of particularly stormy weather -- wind, rain, hail and flooding in some spots North of us -- we finally see some sunshine again!

click image for larger version

The view from my office window

THIS is how I feel today!

How are you?

- - - - - -
Updated:
Hey! What do you see from your windows?
Post a pic on your blog and let me know!

Off the top of my head

2008-06-09T20:59:00.001-05:00

I should REALLY be folding all that laundry.

This blog design needs to change. The stripes and dots are starting to bug me.

Bleh.

Thank goodness Monday is over.

Where my back asks "Woman! What the HELL where you thinking?!"

2008-06-06T23:52:00.002-05:00

So, a few days ago, we got a notice saying that some organization was going to be in our neighborhood and would be picking up donations.

Excellent! I've been riding around with a couple of bags o'junk in the back of the Externally Flameless Mommyvan for months now. I could donate that.

Oh, and that would be a good reason to go through the kids playroom, too.

So, I went downstairs to the playroom, opened the door, flipped on the switch and was greeted by this.

click image for larger version

Oh.My.Gock.

Before I could fully comprehend the scope of this project, I began moving things around in the playroom, collecting garbage and attempting to put the 'sets' back together.

Five hours later it looked like this.

click image for larger version

Hallelujah! There IS a floor!

click image for larger version

And don't tell the kids, but this is some of the stuff I took out of there to donate. You can't see it well here, but there is a whole tub on the other side of those stacked tubs just full of t-o-y-s. (you can see the 'donation' better in the larger version) All those tubs had stuff in them in that monster jungle of a playroom.

Good grief. As God is my witness, I shall never buy another toy for my children again. I swear.*

I'm also NEVER going to take on that project again.*

Now, if you'll excuse me, I've already taken two Advil to quiet my screaming back, and I am in desperate need of a shower before bed. I'm beginning to offend myself.**

*And, I'm probably lying.

**But not about that. Phew!

Brilliant Moment Of The Week

2008-06-03T18:11:00.003-05:00

I got a new phone at work last week.

Call to our I.S. Department: "Hi, it's Kelli. Um, on my new phone... which is the hold button again?"

Answer: The red one.

-------
Update: Another brilliant moment
I just realized I forgot the "# 9 to dial out" rule when I programmed outside numbers into my new phone last week. Dammit.

I'm on a roll this week, baby!

Afterthoughts

2008-06-02T12:39:00.002-05:00

Earlier today, I sent out a message to several ~~suckers~~ friends and relatives ~~begging~~ asking if they would be available to watch the three little clowns for a couple of different Saturdays this month so that both Hubby and I could go out and have some non-kid-chaperoned fun.

I ended the email request with this:

PS - Oh, and if I've talked to you recently and uttered any disparaging words about our dear, sweet, adorable children that led you to believe they were anything but dear, sweet and adorable, I was, of course, being way over the top melodramatic. They're angels. Really. Every single one of them.

PPS - And, right now, at this moment, they're all healthy.

PPPS - Oh... come on... I'll give you a dollar....

Still no takers...

Going, Going, Going, Gone

2008-05-30T17:42:00.001-05:00

Sweet Pea was diagnosed Tuesday afternoon with strep throat. She went to school Tuesday morning with an invisible question mark on her forehead. She was a little bit warmer than usual, but she seemed to be doing ok, and she really wanted to go to school, and she could have been faking the headache... so, I sent her. I got the call to pick her up just after noon. No problem. I figured I would leave work, pick her up and we would take it easy for a bit that afternoon after seeing the doctor.

After visiting the doctor, getting the prescription for the pink bubble gum medicine, and picking up the other two clowns, it was already 4:30pm. After that, it was dinner and laundry and dishes and administering medicine and bedtime for the clowns.

So much for the 'taking it easy' plan.

I should have known it would be like that. I had been trying to find time to sit and relax, maybe even read a book, all during the long holiday weekend that had just passed. That hadn't happened either.

Sweet Pea was under doctor's orders to stay home from school on Wednesday. When I woke up Wednesday morning, I thought the day was going to go like this:

Drop off the oldest and youngest clowns at school
Return home with the middle clown
Eat a leisurely breakfast
Check my home and work emails
Tweet
Read some blogs
Possibly start a load of laundry
Lay on the couch with Sweet Pea
Rest
Watch cartoons

I heard the radio alarm and rolled over, ignoring it. Then, Hubs told me he had made plans to have someone look after Sweet Pea so I could go in to work.

I sat straight up in bed, kicked my legs, pounded my fists on the blankets and screamed "NOOOOO!!! I WANNA STAY HOME!!!! I'M TIRED!!!"

In my head.

I hadn't slept well for several nights in a row by this point. I was very tired, and now I was completely ticked off because I had no legitimate reason to stay home.

Completely petty, right? I know. I couldn't help it. I was beyond worn out in mind, body and soul. My inner child raged while my outer responsible adult got dressed and went to work like a good little employee.

It took a couple of hours for my inner child to stop with the incessant whining about how life is unfair and stoopid and I just wanted to rest please dear God let me rest and on and on and on.

I took a deep breath and attempted to look on the bright side.
I was at work - I had to take a half day off on Tuesday to take care of Sweet Pea, and I had already had a half day off on Thursday to take care of some things for Punkin. Being home on Wednesday would have been a bit of a burden for my boss, as well as using up some of my precious paid days off. Being at work on Wednesday was a good thing.

Since I was at work, I didn't have to watch "Little Einsteins."

There was nothing I *had* to do during my lunch hour. Since I was tired, I went tanning. (I go tanning for the nap I get under the lights.) The day was a bit chilly and dreary, and the lovely warm "photo-therapy" was just what I needed.

Not the day I had planned, for sure, but once I gave my inner child a timeout, I managed to turn my attitude around a bit.

Still a bit tired and weary Wednesday night, I cringed when the kids asked me what was for dinner. I just did NOT want to go through the whole process of making dinner, etc. I paused a moment, then smiled and told Punkin she was going to make the frozen pizzas while I rested on the couch. She was thrilled! So was I! I told the Circus I was putting myself in a timeout on the couch until dinner was ready. For once, I didn't mind the fact that it took Punkin three times as long to complete a task as it would if I did it myself. I truly had no idea why it took her 15 minutes to get the pizzas in the oven, nor did I care at that point. I felt like I had been "going going going" for the past five days and I finally had the opportunity to veg out a bit.

Just as I laid my head on the big fat flame pillow we keep in the family room, the phone rang. Of course it did. I talked to the caller for a bit, then closed my eyes again. The kids were running in and out from outside, then they were coloring -- asking me questions every few minutes. I thought people in timeouts weren't supposed to talk to anyone?

After dinner, I refused to do the dishes... or the laundry... or much of anything else. I resumed my place on the couch and stayed there as long as I could. Oh sure, I got up now and then to grant requests from the rest of the Circus, but mostly I stayed put until the kids were in bed and finally asleep.

I climbed the stairs for bed earlier than I had in days and days, and just before I drifted off to sleep, I thought..."Well, it wasn't what I expected, but it wasn't all together bad either."

There were dishes piled up in the sink and laundry piled up in the hamper. The house was a mess and there were too many things left undone.

And I slept. Finally.

"Life is under no obligation to give us what we expect." -- Margaret Mitchell

Moments

2008-05-26T14:08:00.000-05:00

This morning, I sat on the edge of Punkin's bed and looked at her sleeping face. I've loved that face for ten years.

Punkin was on her side, hands wrapped securely in the blanket, and tucked under her chin. Her features were softened in sleep. I could see the baby she was so long ago, and the girl she was this morning. My Punkin "baby" now had beautiful blonde hair in spite of being born with a cap of hair so dark we referred to her as our Eskimo baby for a while. The little button nose and 'baby bottle' mouth were a bit bigger, but still shaped the same, though.

I leaned down and hugged her, kissed her on the neck and gently woke her. I continued to hold her and rub her back as I remembered the times when she would cuddle on my shoulder and fall into a snuffling, sighing sleep. Punkin slipped back into a doze, neither one of us was anxious to move forward in our day at that moment.

Who she will be in the future and where her path will take her never occurred to me as I sat on the edge of her bed this morning.

There are some places I just can't go sometimes.

What One Ant Can Do

2008-05-21T13:20:00.002-05:00

One morning before school last week, the kids spotted an ant in our foyer. This happens every year when the weather first breaks. We get a few ants. Every Spring, the ants wake up and are all "Dude, when did this house get here? Check this out!" and they just wander on in. Truthfully, I'm surprised it didn't happen sooner this season.

One ant turned into two ants, then three ants, then four ants. The kids stomped on the little buggers while I went to get the spray*. Since we were walking out the door anyway, I told the kids to go climb into the van, I would be out in a minute. With them out of the way, I "Raided" the foyer perimeter, did a quick check of some known trouble spots and off we went.

A couple of days pass. I had instructed the kids to keep the foyer floor picked up in order to keep their sweaters and backpacks ant free. We hadn't spotted any more ants, but we know they'll be back.

Then comes the evening Hubby comes home from work to see the foyer floor "moving." There are ants all over the rugs and floor. Thankfully, they kept their party in our foyer. (Lord knows why, all the good stuff is a mere few feet away in the kitchen, but whatev. I'm grateful.)

Judging from the turned up throw rugs and the Swiffer propped in the corner and the smell that smacked me in the face when I first opened the front door that night**, I could tell the ants had returned and a battle had been fought. Little tiny black ant corpses littered the foyer. From the looks of it, Hubby had won the battle.

Now, I could say that I'd left the rugs and Swiffer and little ant corpses as I found them to serve as some sort of warning against any other ants that dared cross the threshold into our living space -- but truthfully, I just didn't want to clean up the mess at that moment... or the next day, either.

So, when the weekend finally rolled around, I knew I would have to straighten up the foyer and "reclaim" that space from all those dead ants.*** I started by shaking out the throw rugs and putting them in the living room. Next, I swept up all the dead ants.

It had been a good while since I gave the foyer floor more than a quick Swiffer. I resigned myself to also scraping off the bits of paint that had dripped on some of the tiles a few months ago, as well as breaking out the bleach (and an old toothbrush) to brighten up the grout in between the tiles. Not the way I wanted to spend my day, but it needed to be done. I also needed to scrub the memory of the ant carcasses and all that spray off "my" floor.

As I sprayed the bleach on the tile, let it sit, then attacked it with the toothbrush until I could taste the bleach in the back of my throat, it occurred to me this was all because of one little ant who got it into his little ant brain to break into our house and bring his little ant friends with him.

Because of one ant, I had aching muscles that I never even knew existed.

Because of one ant, I had to do all this work.****

I hate ants.

The floor looks good though, doesn't it?

Of course it does. I scrubbed the hell out of it, and banned the circus from stepping even one little tootsie on my very clean floor before it was dry. I immediately took a picture of the sparkingly clean foyer floor because I'm all about before and after pictures. I like to SEE the results of hard work, and to be able to sit back and enjoy the "clean."

Two days later, Sweet Pea came home, took off her gym shoes and dumped sand all over the foyer.*****

*sigh*

I'm not a big fan of sand, either.

- - - - - - - - -

* Better living through chemicals, ya know... unless you are completely against using chemicals to rid yourself of pests. In that case, I totally made that up. Bug Spray! Pfft! Who uses that harmful stuff any more?!

** "Country Fresh Scent" my patushy.

*** Say it with me "Dead Ant, Dead Ant, DeadAntDeadAntDeadAntDeadAntDeadAnnnnnnttt" What? Like you've never heard that Pink Panther theme before...

**** Yeah, ok... I would have had to do all that work anyway, but the ants and the spray gave me a compelling reason, and I rather like my fuzzy logic, thankyouverymuch. It lets me blame the damn ant for invading my space, rather than the people who live in this house. Work with me here.

***** Cleaning the house while the children are still young is like shoveling when it's still snowing.

Fun with Markers

2008-05-19T19:17:00.002-05:00

"Mom! Do you smell a smelly marker that smells?"

"Mommy... do you want to smell the smelly yellow?!"

Great... my five year old is in the other room sniffing markers...

Relax... the brown smells like root beer, the yellow smells like lemon... we're not talkin' huffin certain very potent smelling markers...

Monday Morning

2008-05-19T08:59:00.002-05:00

"Mom, I said I not gonna hug you. You have to cry now."

* giggles from Sweet Pea because she "tricked me" *

"Mom! Look how good I brushed my teeth this morning!"
"That's great honey. Why are you still in your pajamas?"

"Mom, what plus four?"

* giggles from Buddy because he "tricked me" *

"Anyone who isn't dressed in ten minutes will NOT get a donut."

"Mom, I don' wanna go to school." (said to me in his classroom at school)

Happy Hour

2008-05-13T18:11:00.002-05:00

There is a span of time between when I pick up the clowns from school and when we all sit down to dinner that I usually (sarcastically) refer to as "Happy Hour." A while back, I began letting the clowns watch movies in the van on the way home. I did this becase I got tired of listening to them bicker with each other while we inch along in traffic. It may be a cop out of sorts, but is way easier on my nerves.

So, now the clowns are involved in the movie of the week on the way home. Hell doesn't break loose now until we land in our big top foyer.

"Mom! What's for dinner?" and no matter which answer I give, I am most often met with "I don't like that! I don't want that! I'm not going to eat that!"

Yesterday was one of the better days. Everyone was pleased with the night's dinner choice (tacos) and the clowns were excited because they could play outside while they waited for dinner to be ready for them.

I watched the three clowns on the playset outside through the window above the sink in the kitchen as I made dinner. They were playing and running and chasing and loudly discussing strategy and their next moves. Buddy "died" dramatically in the backyard grass several times.

Punkin climbed to the uppermost "deck" of the playset, and I noticed that she is nearly too tall to stand up there. As I considered this, she saw me watching her and promptly grinned and waved.

A thought crossed my mind, and before my grownup inner voice could say "No, don't do that", I threw my hands up in the air, made a goofy face, stuck out my tongue, and dropped to the floor -- all in full view of that window above the sink.

I waited a beat or two, then slowly stood back up and peeked out the window. Punkin was still standing on that upper deck, mouth open in disbelief for a moment before she began laughing.

The two of us were laughing at eachother, which attracted the attention of the two littles. In order to find out what was up, they climbed up on the deck bench and peeked in the kitchen window at me. I made another goofy face and again dropped to the floor. After that, I split the rest of the time before dinner being "shot" and "dying" while I made dinner, chatted with Hubby, cleared out the dishwasher and set the table. I could hear the kids giggling through the kitchen window.

Dinner was a bit later than usual, but for once in a very long while, Happy Hour, really was Happy.

There's a reason

2008-05-13T08:10:00.000-05:00

Actual dinnertime conversation, or "How to freak out the kids"

Scene: Dinner table - The Circus family, plus Grandma, Grandpa Choo-Choo and the fabulous Aunt A.J.

Menu: Chicken strips, corn, soup, oyster crackers and some other stuff.

Me: Buddy, do you want some of these little baby crackers?

Buddy: Yeth, pleathe.

Sweet Pea: Oh, me too!

Aunt A.J.: You know, they're made of babies...

Kids: *blank open-mouthed, disbelieving stares*

It's really kind of difficult to reassure children that baby crackers are not made of babies while you're laughing...

There's a reason we don't see Aunt A.J. that often... *

* And, actually, that reason has everything to do with her hectic schedule and hardly anything at all to do with the things she says to the kids.

Mudders Day

2008-05-11T19:46:00.004-05:00

It's been a lovely day here at the Circus.

Early this morning, I called my Moms. Mom invited me out to lunch, but I politely declined. Opting to spend the time here at home, instead.

I served breakfast and lunch to the circus family, but Hubs bought dinner.

I set about to make a cake (because I've been really jonesing for chocolate cake), and Hubs stepped in and mixed it up for me.

The clowns made a "formal presentation" (with cue cards!) of homemade cards and pictures. Punkin also gave me several coupons--she will do dishes, fold laundry, clean the playroom, etc). I can redeem each coupon twice and they expire next year. (I quickly discovered I can only use one coupon a day, though).

After getting a few chores done, I sat down in my chair, read my book, napped and read my book again.

The kids have been little monkeys today (and for the last few days, actually). They're still mostly sweet, though.

It's been a lovely day, I hate to see it end.

Happy Mudders Day!

The Hug Mugger

2008-05-06T08:02:00.003-05:00

We have a routine when we dropped the girls off at school. I sign them in as the girls set down their backpacks in their usual spots. Buddy comes along and picks out a picture to color and brings it with him to his school.

Leaving can be tricky sometimes. If we're having a "sensitive" morning, Sweet Pea may be sad and possibly cry when I have to leave. It breaks my heart--even as I know she'll be fine moments after I leave.

She started to be a bit sad this morning, then recovered nicely after an extra round of hugs and kisses. Buddy had run over to the outside doors as I did this today. After Sweet Pea and I had separated and walked each about 10 paces in opposite directions, Buddy popped out of his hiding place and started running, calling to his sister at the same time. "Sweet Pea! Sweet Pea!" I called her once to get her attention and she turned just in time to accept a quick running hug from Buddy. The hug was sudden and quick and was more like a mugging than a hugging.

After saying goodbye to Sweet Pea, he searched out and found Punkin sitting at a table. He made a beeline for her "PUNKIN!!" and mug hugged her, too. He didn't run then, though. Instead, he grabbed her face in both his hands, and planted a goodbye kiss on her before running off.

My heart smiled in the moments before I saw Punkin's startled expression. I laughed out loud. Our boy is a kissing bandit hug mugger.

Egads.

Drive By Update

2008-05-02T19:13:00.006-05:00

To say I was a wee bit stressed this morning with the commute and the exam stretching out in front of me would be a HUGE understatement. I was anxious and stressed and short-tempered with the kids... and maybe a coworker or two. Oops.

Today, I got to drive one hour and fifty minutes down to Joliet, IL for a three and a half hour, 175 question test. The drive should have taken one hour and thirty-two minutes, but all the traffic and the semi-trucks, the heavy rain, and the fact that I had no freakin' idea where the hell I was going slowed me down.

On the upside, the Certified Administrative Professional (CAP) exam only took me about two hours and forty-five minutes, and there was only 173 questions.

The ride back went much smoother - the sun was out, there was a lovely breeze, and traffic was lighter. I even made it home in time to have dinner (hot dogs, fries and Italian beef I picked up) with the circus. That was kinda nice.

After dinner, I was just about to leave to go pick up some milk (that I had forgotten to get on the way home) when the skies opened up and dumped on us. All while the sun was shining making the rain look like diamonds falling from the sky. This also meant we got to see our first rainbow of the year.

*Deep breath in*

*Exhale*

I am SO glad that exam is over...

That's My Girl

2008-04-30T19:39:00.003-05:00

Our oldest clown, Punkin, likes to retype her spelling words for the week, print them out and study them before her weekly spelling test.

This week's list is below. I called out the words, and Punkin typed each one in Notepad while spelling the words out loud. She got them all correct.

Except one.

In My World Today

2008-04-28T19:30:00.003-05:00

I've been looking at spring outside my office
window (mixed with some winter, too today)

Seeing through these new glasses

Working on this

Lookin' like this
I love my blanket sweater

The Way It Goes

2008-04-27T21:06:00.002-05:00

If you buy cute new sandals, and paint your toenails in preparation to wear the cute new sandals, the weather will change, the temperature will drop and you'll have to wait to wear the cute new sandals.

Thankfully, I can wear my killer boots.

Shoooooozzze

2008-04-24T18:34:00.001-05:00

Because I don't have quite enough adventure in my life, I took all three clowns to the shoe store the other night while Hubby stayed home and put the finishing touches on painting the basement. If you've never been shoe shopping with three children aged 10 and under, well, you're just missing out on the excitment, my friend.

Punkin kept going over to the aisle that held shoes in her size, and coming back with cute shoes that fit nicely and were priced accordingly, then nearly stomping off in a pout when I asked her to find something else, while Sweet Pea refused to try on anything I picked out for her. Sweet Pea and Buddy kept finding shoes that were not in their size, asking my opinion, then asking me to put the shoes back on the shelf for them while I was trying to locate a pair of shoes that they might like, that were in my price range, that were in their size. I understand now why some mothers put their children on those "leashes" I've seen. (Although, if Sweet Pea and Buddy were both on leashes, they would probably succeed in wrapping around and restraining me while they ran amock in the store.) Those little people are fast... and grabby... and easily distracted by pretty shoes. (I have NO idea where they got that from)

Thankfully, I was able to find them each a pair of gym shoes and a pair of sandals for summer before I did a little shoe-hunting for my own self. Ah... so many cute shoes, so little time and money and outfits to match...

About ninety minutes, two trips to the "Employee Only" bathroom, and countless pairs of shoes tried on and discarded later, the three clowns and I had ~~settled for~~ decided on four pairs of gym shoes, four pairs of sandals, and three pairs of flip-flops. (What? The store was having a buy one pair, get one pair half off sale...)

The clowns were so pleased with their new shoes, the each wanted to wear one of their new pairs out of the store. It was getting to be half-passed their standard bedtime, so the clowns were beginning to get a wee bit more wound up (and I didn't think that was possible). Getting them to focus on what I was saying, and getting them to calm down and quit zipping around the store in their new shoes proved to be a feat (heh) in itself.

"Mom! Look! I mixed up the shoes!"

"Greaaattt. I'm sure the high-schooler who works the floor will be dazzled with your product display organizational skills."

Thankfully, blackmail still works.
"Whoever is not listening will not be getting new shoes tonight."

Back in the externally flameless Mommyvan, Buddy started fussing about having to go to bed when we arrived back home. I wonder how long I can use "If you don't behave, I'll take those shoes right back to the store!"

Thursday Rambling

2008-04-23T16:09:00.002-05:00

This is a long, rambling post -- more of a brain dump, really. There's a summary at the end if you'd rather not read the long, rambly detail. There should be another post up sometime on Thursday. Consider yourself warned.

May 2 I will take my CAP - Certified Administrative Professional - exam. If I pass this exam, I can add CPS/CAP after my name on my business cards. It looks good on a resume, and it looks good for my boss (the President of the company) to have that following my name, as his assistant.

Until May 2, I'm mostly studying and trying to ignore the big stack of books I have at home. I'm also trying not to be tempted to borrow any books from the library right now. It's difficult though because I hear the books calling to me when we make our (now) weekly trip to the public library.

Today was Administrative Professional's Day. A small group of managers invited the four of us who fall into the "assistant" category out to lunch today. It was a nice gesture, and a tasty lunch. I did my best to dress the part, but the "chic professional" look I was going for landed smack in "sloppy airline attendant" instead. (I love my navy skirt and heels, but I always feel a bit "stewardessy" when I wear them.)

I'm consoled, however, with the fact that tomorrow I will be in Mommyland, and not in the office. Our oldest, Punkin, his having some teeth pulled in preparation for a "holding arch" which is in preparation for the braces she will eventually get. (Unfortunately for her, she inherited her Mommy's big teeth and small jaw -- I've already apologized to her... and written the first of many checks to the orthodontist.) Tomorrow I will be speding the day at home with Punkin, who has recently informed us she wants to join band next year.

The weather has been lovely the past few days, and it looks as though it will continue to be that way tomorrow as well. I'm looking forward to being home in a quiet house, having the windows open to the breeze. Studying on the deck sounds like a fabulous idea, doesn't it? I could even nap out there in the sunshine... that is, if the carpet guys finish early enough. We're in (ok, Hubby is in) the home stretch of finishing off the basement. Once the carpet is delivered, we can order furniture so we don't have to sit on lawn chairs to watch television any more.

In summary,

I am and will be studying for the next week or so. After that, I can read for fun again. Woo!

I was taken out to lunch for Administrative Professionals' Day

I feel very schlumpy today. Tomorrow, I will be comfortably schlumpy at home, while watching over the less-toothful ten year old and studying. Either in the house, or out on the deck. Or maybe napping... either in the house or out on the deck.

Carpet will be installed in the basement tomorrow.

Punkin wants to join the band.

Sweet Pea wants to dye her hair pink and purple.

Buddy still hasn't mastered the art of pooping on the potty.

Just as we suspected

2008-04-21T20:46:00.001-05:00

"Mom, I want to dye my hair pink and purple." -- Sweet Pea, 5 years old

MeMe Monday

2008-04-20T19:54:00.000-05:00

Jenn at Juggling Life tagged me with this meme:

1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post, the player tags 5 people and posts their name, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they've been tagged and asking them to read your blog.

***
What I was doing 10 years ago:
Ten years ago, I was still in my very first year of being a Mom, and on the cusp of turning *gasp* 30 years old. I was blissfully unaware of what the next ten years would bring.

Five Snacks I enjoy:
In a perfect, non weight-gaining world
1. Hot fudge brownie sundae
2. Chocolate
3. Homemade chocolate chip cookies
4. Bakery-made or homemade butter cookies
5. Mozzarella sticks

In the real world
1. Hot fudge brownie sundae
2. Chocolate
3. Homemade chocolate chip cookies
4. Bakery-made or homemade butter cookies
5. Mozzarella sticks

Things I would do if I were a billionaire:
1. Quit my job
2. Set aside money for our kids to be 'comfortable' (but not too comfortable) for the rest of their lives.
3. Give some away to deserving people and charities; give some to friends, family.
4. Move to Arizona.
5. Travel the United States more.

Five jobs that I have had:
1. Executive Assistant
2. Administrative Assistant
3. Sales Secretary
4. Kmart Cashier
5. Receptionist

Three of my habits:
1. Reading
2. Napping
3. Blogging

Five place I have lived:
1. Libertyville, IL
2. Fox Lake, IL
3. Arlington Heights, IL
4. Rolling Meadows, IL
5. Mount Prospect, IL

Five People I Want to Get to Know Better: (a nice way of saying TAG!) But don't feel obligated! Just do it if you want to.
1.You
2. If you
3. Feel Like
4. Playing
5. It's fun!

Let me know if you played!

Friday, there was an earthquake

2008-04-18T11:33:00.004-05:00

No kidding. Apparently, a 5.2 earthquake shook West Salem, IL. (West Salem, IL is about 315 miles South of where I am) The quake was felt far and wide.

Apparently, it initially happened around 4:37am. I didn't feel that, but then again, I was asleep. Not much rouses me from sleep, and only then if it says "Mom?" first... and that's not a guarantee either.

However, around 10:20am, my chair and workstation/desk (gotta love cubicle furniture) felt like it was moving a bit. I looked at my Coke and could see it moving in the bottle as I sat at my desk. About that time, my boss came out of his office to ask me if I felt the tremor, too.

Wowzer.

Did you feel today's earthquake?

Have you ever been in an earthquake?

Thursday, it rained

2008-04-17T12:36:00.002-05:00

Or at least kick it really hard.

The rain will pass
All you can do is wait it out
Open up your umbrella
Take a deep breath
Put on some cool boots
And go about your business
Until the sun comes out again

Tuesday

2008-04-15T20:36:00.004-05:00

I have just spent the majority of the last few days sitting on my behind, reading a book. Now, I haven't been a total slug -- I've been doing some housework and errands, and for five minutes this weekend, our laundry room looked nearly clean. Mostly, though, I've been sitting on my behind, reading my book. It's a good book. Oh, and naps -- I've taken a nap or two over the last few days as well.*

It's been lovely. Truly.

Today, however, won't be the same.

In spite of going to bed at a reasonable hour, my body and mind are still tired. It feels as though my aching shoulders and back are covered by a 30 pound lead apron. I keep reminding myself to sit up straight, stand up straight, only to find my shoulders curling forward moments later.

Hubby leaves for work, and it's my job to play 'cheerleader' for the clowns, encouraging them to get out of bed and get themselves dressed for their day at school. This morning, it takes far more energy than I have to do this.

"But, Mommy... I really don't want to go to school today. I'm tired and I don't feel good and I just want to stay home." This comes from my dear little brown-eyed girl clown, standing in front of me in her purple nightgown with sleep still written all over her soft face. At that moment, I realize her words are an exact echo of what my own inner child is saying to me. "Nooo... I don' wanna go... just five more minutes... why can't I stay home today?" I want to listen to my inner child this time. I can feel my will crumbling as I look into the deep brown eyes of our middle clown and remember how wonderful it is to just sit and wile away the day. I've enjoyed the last couple of days very much.

see more crazy cat pics

Every bone in my body is telling me to stay home today. "Rest", they whisper. "Read your book", they taunt. "Relax", they say. I'm tempted. Sorely tempted. Just before I can say the words that would keep us home, though, I get a sudden feeling that if I take today off work, I'll never make it back to the office. (Which, on the one hand would be just fine with me. Unfortunately, we like the eat. It may only be chicken nuggets and fries, but it still costs money...)

Instead, I freely admit to the clowns that I would much rather be under the covers, fast asleep, rather than getting ready to start my day. They seem to understand this and begin to get ready as I step into the shower in a nearly futile attempt to get my body moving. Thankfully, they get dressed without any drama, and are even able to watch some television before it's time to leave. For this, I'm completely grateful because today, I am the one doing the stalling.

Right now, my inner child is stomping around, having a fit because she didn't get to stay home and read her book today. Hell, it's going to be sunny and warmer today. I could have read that book outside in a lounge chair on our deck.

At work, I work off the list that is my email, field requests from the boss, handle incoming calls and do everything I can to not think about the sunshine and fresh air just outside my window.

At lunchtime, I changed out of my high heels and took a walk around the corporate complex for a bit. Ah... fresh air, sunshine. I breathed deep and tried once again to ignore the inner child's tantrum about having to go back to the gray office interior.

- - - - - - - -

* I could use a nap now, as a matter of fact.

Update: Wednesday was about the same, but maybe a teensy weensy bit better.

Sunshine

2008-04-10T19:53:00.002-05:00

There was a cold wind
and it rained all through the day
Thursday

Still
there was sunshine
friends that called
laughing conversations
hugs from the clowns
kisses from the Hubs
a soft, warm bed to land in
at the end of the day

The promise of Friday
drinks and ~~dessert~~ dinner
with Our Erika
after work on Friday
the promise of more laughter

Time to sleep in
Saturday, Sunday

New music to hear
new books to read
the fresh smell
of cucumber melon hand lotion
the warmth of hot chocolate

Life is good
even when it's cold
and rains all day

My Circus Life

April 1

Progess, Not Perfection

It Must Have Been A Good Day

Beginning Again

5th Annual Blog Cookie Exchange

Circus Photos!

The After Party

November 13th

Just like that

When Worlds Collide

New 'do

Clownin' around

I don't know what that was, but I liked it

Off the top of my head

So very random -- no, really.

Calling it

Past Time

Moving Back

A Comeback

Moving

Lazy Blogging

Moving

Circus Life Moments # 3

A Personal Political Epiphany

Happy (delayed) New Year

Grandpa Rich

Tell me its true...

Tuesday night

Awake On A Sunday

Happy New Year!

Merry Christmas - 2008

Sunday Update

It's Happening Again...

I've been told

Buddyflies

Lil Old Lady

How's this?

Thursday Night Drive By

Please tell me

Celebrating 40

Insert *BIG HUGE SMILE* here -- * Updated!

Much better

State of the CircusKelli

State of the Circus

Another Circus Road Trip

Around The Big Top

Seriously

Hubby, Do NOT Read This

The Real Reason

CircusKelli: Yearbooked

40 Hours In Nashville

Murphy's Law of Attraction

Aw, damn

Whiplash

I can, I am

Day 8: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

Peptalks

Days 6 and 7: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

Order Confirmation

Pausing for station identification

Day Five: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

Day Four: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

Day Three: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

Day Two: 2008 Great Circus Road Trip

Great Circus Road Trip 2008: Day One

And now back to...

Home Sweet Home

Happy July Fourth!

Circus Giraffes

Mommyland and Book Memes

One Lazy Sunday

Buddy Sings

If I don't Toot it, who will?

Fathers

And... we're back!

Off the top of my head

Where my back asks "Woman! What the HELL where you thinking?!"

Brilliant Moment Of The Week

Afterthoughts

Insert BIG HUGE SMILE here -- * Updated!